Night tantrums in a child: what can provoke and how to calm the baby

How to behave after you throw a tantrum

You couldn’t contain your emotions and threw a tantrum in front of your colleagues and boss...

Don't despair, it's not the end of the world.

First, calm down and try to bring yourself back to normal. You must realize that you are ready to apologize. Organize your thoughts, leave the building for 15 minutes, wash your face, drink a cup of tea. There is no need to rush yourself. If you're not ready to talk to your co-workers today, do it the next day. Just don’t prolong the problem for a long time. Take courage and apologize. You are responsible for what happened. The worst option is to pretend that nothing happened. It's not nice to the people you offended. Otherwise, you cannot avoid rumors and discussions behind your back. Some colleagues may feel intimidated by you.

Don't be afraid to use humor: smile and joke about your behavior. This will smooth out the unpleasant impression and relieve tension. If you have offended one person, apologize to that person publicly. Ask for forgiveness from other employees: “I apologize for the fact that you witnessed such an unpleasant situation.”

This behavior will command respect. Even if you apologize behind closed doors, many will still think that the problem has not been resolved. The apology should be concise and understandable, the voice should be calm and confident. Do not attribute your breakdown to some external circumstances - poor health or personal problems. Don't blame your colleagues for provoking you. Don’t give numerous assurances that this will never happen again: you don’t need to demand the impossible from yourself.

Tell them that you will do everything on your part to prevent your behavior from happening again. But from now on, work on yourself to keep your promise. If you lashed out at a subordinate and feel entitled, first discuss what happened with him in private. Ask for forgiveness for the hysteria and express your readiness to apologize publicly for the incorrect form of statement, but explain that your reproaches are fair.

Find the golden mean between ingratiation and emphasized coldness. Hasty excuses and servile behavior most often cause aggression and a desire to get rid of the person. If you lavish compliments and engage in excessive self-flagellation, you will be treated with hostility. No need to replay. A person on a subconscious level always subtly senses falsehood. Vacation or dismissal is not a way out of the situation, but an escape from the problem. There is no guarantee that the hysteria will not happen again.

Nadezhda Kuzmina “Labor”

What are hysterics?

Every hysteria begins with a scream. The child screams, demanding nothing and not seeing anyone around. Then comes the stage of motor excitement: he throws everything that comes to his hand, if there is nothing, he simply stomps his feet and waves his arms randomly. It all ends with a stage of sobbing.

In psychology, there are two types of hysterics:

- character hysteria, which helps to defuse emotional tension;

- manipulative hysteria that helps the child control other people.

Photo source: ya-roditel.ru

A child's aggression usually manifests itself in attacks on other children and adults. The kid calls them names and deliberately uses rude expressions. This is a “ruffy”, pugnacious and rude child. As a little person grows up, his knowledge about the surrounding reality expands. He resorts to this tried-and-true protest behavior less often.

Children from birth to 3 years old, as a rule, show auto-aggression (directed at themselves) in situations where their parents prohibit them from doing something. The baby does not know how to react differently to his negative experiences. Therefore, in case of a ban: “Don’t take Misha’s shovel!”, the baby swings at his mother. And when she expresses displeasure, she begins to beat herself. Young children do not know how to control and adequately express their emotions.

Hysterical child at three years old

This is the period when there is a desire to feel like an adult and, even more so, independent. A hysterical child at the age of three begins to recognize himself as an individual, and often this age is accompanied by unprecedented stubbornness and negativism, pronounced self-will. A time characterized by the phrase: “In spite of everything, in spite of everything.”

Hysterics? It is possible to wean them off, but without trying to break them, without focusing on signs of bad behavior. At the same time, the child should not feel that hysteria can achieve anything at all. The most correct thing would be to try to switch attention to something else, for example, playing a game together, watching cartoons. Naturally, at the peak of hysteria, doing this is completely pointless.

It will be useful to prevent tantrums by learning to avoid situations that can provoke them. In particular, avoid situations where the child can say his weighty “No!” It would be quite correct to create a situation where there is supposedly a choice, although in reality there is none. For example: “Let's go for a walk. Where do you want to have fun, in the yard or in the park?

Upon reaching the age of four, the attacks of hysteria gradually disappear and this is due to the fact that the child begins to speak sufficiently and can express his dissatisfaction or desire in words.

How to prevent it?

You can’t ignore hysterics, whether from a lady or on the street, experts say. It is a mistake to think that a child is bullying or showing character. He is upset, offended, disappointed and reacts as best he can: hysterical. To avoid this, you need to communicate. Tell them that crying will be replaced by the words “I’m upset.” Watch cartoons about whimsical whims. On the street, warn in advance that you will be going home soon. Negotiate, take into account interests. Slow down parental dictates.

Love and a sense of security are insurance against conflicts. Universal, accessible to everyone. This is the best that a family can give a child.

Root causes of children's hysterics

First of all, the root causes of children's hysteria are hidden in the conflict of children's and parent's interests, since as the child grows up, his own desires arise, which often run counter to the wishes of adults.

Typical situations that provoke hysterical attacks are:

• inability to verbally express personal dissatisfaction;
• the desire to concentrate attention on oneself in any way;
• the desire to get something absolutely necessary right now;
• painful or post-painful condition;
• excessive care on the part of adults, adjacent to pathological severity;
• weak attitude of adults towards the actions of the child;
• lack of a reward and punishment system;
• interrupting an activity that is initially interesting.

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And we, of course, would believe it, but only at the last interrogation Ksenia Anatolyevna called some of these same Russians “little bastards”, in general, she considers us all “genetic scum”, and now she herself has such an interesting “Santa Barbara” In marriage, what’s the time to write about Chernobyl, don’t you agree? With a small victorious war in tension, we have to use old cliches. However, this does not only concern Mrs. Vitorgan. For example, yesterday, all day long, everyone was telling people that there would soon be famine in Moscow, because Putin had ruined the country!

There are no interruptions in food supplies to Moscow, Moscow Mayor Sergei Sobyanin said.

Panic rumors about interruptions in food delivery have no basis. There are more than enough passes for cars for delivery to stores and retail chains,” Sobyanin noted on his Vkontakte page. I will still understand when in 1917 and earlier, provocateurs in St. Petersburg stood in line for food and spread similar rumors. But after more than 100 years, having eyes, having the Internet and TV, in the end, realizing that we have neither a war (in the hot phase) nor a revolution (except for the Ekho Moskvy radio website) to engage in such nonsense? Trouble. And, of course, a sign of the times. Here, for example, is another episode: The Russian Government is preparing a number of transactions for the privatization of state-owned companies, the work is going on behind closed doors, said the head of the Russian Ministry of Economic Development, Maxim Oreshkin, speaking at the World Economic Forum in Davos.

“We are working on a number of [privatization] transactions, working in a closed format. When you are preparing deals, it should not be public, there is no need to discuss with whom we are negotiating. There are a number of assets that will become positive for the Russian economy if additional investments also come from foreign partners,” Oreshkin said.

He added that work with foreign investors is underway.

Uh-huh.
Despite the applicant's status, there are more questions than answers. Firstly, because this year Davos was completely marginalized - only Soros, interestingly enough, spoke about his hatred of China, but the presidents of leading countries were not among the participants. And, secondly, we have been hearing about a new wave of privatization since 2008 without interruption. True, since then, state participation in the country’s economy has only increased, we have exchanged a bunch of stupid American treasuries for gold, and the promised new debit, which is constantly being promised, has not happened. What, is there a reason to change something after the 5th year of being torn to shreds? And most importantly, change for what? For dollars? And so on all fronts. Then Russia is running out of oil. When our senators are imprisoned, it means they are all like that (and when they don’t imprison them, they are all like that, but everything is rotten). It would be better to focus on the economy, not Venezuela. And if we now surrender Venezuela or lose some of the investments, there will be screams, as you understand, that Putin has leaked it. And it will be like this for a long time. Because this is the time. But we will win, I'm sure of that. So read “SuccessRush” - you won’t be bored. Comments (0) | Print | | Complaint
Source:

https://uspehrussia.livejournal.com/696344.html

Unreasonable tantrums

When a child starts to get hysterical, the main thing for parents is not to get worked up themselves. Only in a calm state can you understand what he wants and how to act. In this case, shouting and punishment will achieve nothing; it will only aggravate the situation.

First, you should listen to what exactly the child wants, why this hysteria occurred. Then act based on the reason. The following methods can be used:

A distracting maneuver is to take the child to another room, to the window and show him something interesting, you can come up with some kind of hobby (start blowing soap bubbles, hide from the child and tell him to look), turn on an interesting cartoon.

If the child’s demands are not too high, why the hysteria occurred, you can meet him halfway. For example, he wanted to watch a cartoon or eat candy. In some cases, it is better to meet halfway, but never when a child demands to buy him a toy, in the future this can turn into constant blackmail on his part, and every trip to the store will be accompanied by hysterics. After this, you must definitely discuss with the child that today the parents met halfway, but next time you cannot do this.

Let the child cry. There are benefits to this too. Unreasonable tears are a sign that children are emotionally tired and in this way they will get relief. After all, adults, too, when they are emotionally tired, want to cry, especially women.

The important point is that after the child calms down, it is necessary to have a conversation with him. Ask him whether he thought it was necessary to be so upset about this and whether something could be done about it. Show how much useful time he lost when he could calmly play or watch TV.