5 facts about childbirth that frighten pregnant women

7–10% of women experience severe fear of childbirth

The most interesting thing is that both primiparous and multiparous people panic in approximately the same way: beginners because they don’t know anything, experienced ones because they know everything. Such panic fear can be much more dangerous than childbirth itself. Having heard enough scary stories, especially anxious women imagine the most terrible pictures. But the danger is not that these assumptions will come true, but that, being in a state of stress, the mother worsens her health and the health of the unborn baby. But all this has nothing to do with you, right? After all, you are armed with 10 universal ways to get rid of this fear.

1.
Search for causes
Often the source of fear is in the past, and it takes some courage to remember your unpleasant experience. These could be previous miscarriages, the loss of a child, worries about abortions, difficult births with relatives and loved ones, frightening stories that made a great impression on you. Think about what causes fear in you. Awareness of fear will be the first step towards combating it; it will turn from an incomprehensible fear into a very concrete (albeit unpleasant) fact of life. Next, you should try to objectively assess your risk in terms of the severity of labor by talking about this topic with your obstetrician-gynecologist. Then you will be able to realistically assess the possible danger and prevent it by following the doctor’s recommendations.

2. Consultation with a psychologist

Such a consultation is necessary if you have previously experienced any significant traumatic situation (frozen pregnancy, miscarriage, abortion, etc.). It is clear that in such cases, one intimate conversation with a friend or mother is not enough. Often you need professional help to help you understand your feelings. Often, after mental trauma, women withdraw into their experiences, sometimes fearing condemnation from loved ones. It’s easier to tell a psychotherapist or psychologist about this - the information will not go beyond his office. If you don't like one specialist, turn to another! In your case, complete trust and sincerity are important. And one more thing: be prepared for therapy, usually this is a specific course that the consultant will prescribe.

4. Whoever is with me is a hero

Some expectant mothers are afraid of being in an unfamiliar place; they often worry about the manipulations of health workers, because there will be no one to control the process. If this worries you, then it is better to choose a maternity hospital in advance where you are allowed to invite your husband, mother, sister, or friend to the birth. You can be with your loved ones only at the beginning of labor (during contractions), asking them to wait outside the door for the period of the actual birth of the child, if some aesthetic aspect bothers you. The presence of a soul mate nearby can bring not only emotional support, but also practical benefits. This could be a relaxing massage, help with proper breathing, or taking a comfortable position. In any case, you must remember that this needs to be thought through and decided in advance. According to existing rules, the person who will accompany you will need to provide certain information about the state of their health or enter into a contract with the maternity hospital if this service is paid.

5. Useful acquaintance

First-time mothers, who are particularly modest and bashful, may be embarrassed that at the time of childbirth, all intimate organs will be visible to a complete stranger, and even more so a man. Although, from the time contractions begin, any feeling of shame disappears without reminding oneself (probably physiological mechanisms also come into play): it becomes the main thing in the woman’s consciousness. If you are frightened by the upcoming interaction with a stranger, the solution is simple. You can meet the doctor in advance and immediately clarify a number of concerns. This way the overwhelming majority of worries will disappear.

6. More positive emotions!

All pregnant women, without exception, need to receive as many positive emotions as possible, be it communication, contemplation of beauty (everything that brings aesthetic pleasure), listening to pleasant music, singing. Do you like to watch TV? Try to exclude crime chronicles, programs about road accidents, and natural disasters from viewing. From the print media, it is better to choose periodicals that cover the specifics of your current condition: magazines for expectant parents, about children. Read fiction that brings you emotional satisfaction. Poetry lovers should pay attention to the lyrics and other favorite works.

7. Finding a useful activity

Try to choose an activity that you like that you could get carried away with, receiving only positive emotions and distracting from your fears. Do you love handicrafts? Do it more actively or try to learn something new: scrapbooking, craquelure, decoupage. Almost all women love shopping, because it brings a lot of positive emotions. Forget the superstition that you shouldn’t shop for your baby before he’s born. These assumptions have already been refuted thousands of times in practice. It’s better to get positive emotions by carefully choosing a wardrobe for your unborn child.

9. Home birth option, but...

Recently, pregnant women often choose this option, meeting a midwife in advance and attending alternative childbirth courses. In this case, you will remain in your usual home environment, there may be people close to you... But you must clearly know that home birth is a serious risk! The only thing that can somehow guarantee timely assistance is an ambulance team on duty outside your windows for the entire period of childbirth, since in case of any complications there is a danger of losing the child or your own life.

10. Focusing thoughts on the child

Childbirth is a natural process inherent in nature. Now, at this minute, at this second, healthy wonderful children are being born all over the world. Don’t forget that your baby feels all your anxieties, fears and experiences them with you, so think first of all about him, about your upcoming meeting, about how you love him and are looking forward to his birth. Close your eyes and imagine hugging the smallest and dearest person in the world who has just been given life. And if tears appear in your eyes, they will be tears of joy! Good luck and health to you and your future children!

Expecting a child is a wonderful period, despite all its difficulties. But the closer the moment of meeting the baby, the stronger the fear of childbirth, which not only seriously overshadows the pleasant expectation, but can also cause harm. So let's defeat him!

Why is fear of childbirth dangerous?

Motherhood is the main purpose of a woman. And there is no greater happiness than holding your own blood in your arms for the first time. But the upcoming birth causes real panic in some expectant mothers, which, being completely irrational, can cause harm. Namely:

the baby in the womb feels all the mother’s worries and worries himself;
during childbirth, there is absolutely no need to panic - despite the pain, the woman needs to maintain maximum self-control and strictly follow all the instructions of the doctor and obstetrician;
fear and pain are interconnected phenomena. The more afraid you are, the more painful childbirth will be.

But it’s pain that scares us in the first place, isn’t it? It turns out to be a vicious circle, breaking which is the primary task.

About the causes of fear

Where does fear come from, and what exactly is a woman in labor afraid of? It would seem that what could be more natural for a woman than childbirth? But in our imagination, the birth process seems to be something very scary and dangerous. Why is this happening?

Perhaps the roots of fear of childbirth stretch back to past centuries, when the mortality rate of mothers and their babies was too high. Plus, the stories of our grandmothers and mothers about Soviet maternity hospitals with dull walls and rude staff. In addition, complaints about doctors are found everywhere today: in newspapers, on TV, on Internet forums, etc. How can you not be afraid to go to medical institutions in such an atmosphere? The unknown (if this is the first birth) is also depressing! It’s difficult to imagine, much less predict, how everything will go. And this is perhaps the most important factor.

When asked what exactly is scary about childbirth, most women answer:

pain;
possible death;
birth of a child with disabilities.

It’s so scary that some expectant mothers, having learned about their interesting situation, begin to think about terminating the pregnancy and being ready to undergo a caesarean section, just so as not to give birth naturally.

Pregnancy and childbirth are important work, the result of which will be happy motherhood. And to overcome the fear of the moment of delivery, you will also have to work hard. Psychologists and their valuable advice will help us with this:

First of all, women in an interesting position are advised to protect themselves from any “horror stories”
.
On the contrary, you should focus on happy stories, of which there are much more than sad ones. And it’s simple -
look around and see how many mothers with children are around.
They all went through childbirth and did not die. You can also pull up statistics and find out the percentage of adverse outcomes during childbirth. It is insignificantly small, and this is a powerful argument to stop shaking like an aspen leaf, drawing in your imagination pictures one more terrible than the other.
In order not to be tormented by the unknown, it is useful
to read specialized literature and find out how the birth of a child takes place.
This will help you realize that we are talking about a natural process for the female body, and there is nothing to be afraid of. In addition, deep theoretical knowledge will help during childbirth to be not a defenseless patient in the hands of doctors, but a full participant in the process, completely and completely in control of the situation.
Instead of passively indulging in fear,
get busy! Take a notepad and pen, write a plan of action to take before giving birth, and meticulously implement what you have planned. Collect things for the maternity hospital, buy everything you need for the baby, clean up the house, prepare the children's room, decide on the maternity hospital, agree with the doctor who will conduct the birth, etc. Such useful work will push dark thoughts further away.

Psychologist Marina Antonova gives valuable advice. She says:

“It is very important to recognize your fear. Don't hide from him, but look him in the face and admit that you're afraid. Then “sort out the fear.” Answer yourself clearly what exactly scares you. And put forward your counterarguments for each point. As a result, fear cannot resist your logic and retreats. You need to be honest with yourself and with your loved ones. There is no point in turning on your pride and pretending to be an iron lady. After all, the support and understanding of loved ones works wonders. By the way, partner births are possible today. You can take your husband or other relative with you, who will make sure that everything goes well, which means there is nothing to be afraid of.”

Pregnancy is undoubtedly an amazing and incomparable period in a woman’s life. New impressions and sensations, a sense of pride, the extremely caring attitude of loved ones - the whole kaleidoscope of emotions is difficult to describe in words. But this kaleidoscope contains both fears and experiences, which, growing like a snowball, can ultimately result in real depression. The fear of childbirth intensifies towards the decisive date, and the woman has no one to tell her how to cope with this and tune in to a positive outcome.

fear of dying in childbirth

My birth took place almost 2 years and 2 months ago. They lasted almost 13 hours. Before the birth, the card said thrombocytopenia, hypotensive syndrome. My birth was full of fears. There was a strong fear of dying during childbirth, and there was a fear of ECS. There was no fear of pain, there was fear that something would go wrong. Apparently the hormones were playing havoc. But I tried my best to be positive.

A little background - At 38 weeks I was admitted to the pregnancy pathology department with a suspected large fetus. In principle, I didn’t mind, because it seemed to me that it was calmer. They did an ultrasound, set the weight to 3700, kept me in the hospital for 12 days and discharged me at 40 weeks with the words - you will come with contractions. I spent a little over a week at home, but contractions never started, so I was sent to the hospital again. Where they did an ultrasound again, and according to the ultrasound the baby’s weight was already 4560!!! I thought, how can I give birth to such an elephant)) 2 doctors looked at me, it was decided to pierce the bladder the next morning, they said, don’t worry, you won’t give birth, we’ll cut it. I categorically did not want this and was afraid, especially since two of my friends just ended up on ECS, and this prospect did not make me happy.

On Thursday, February 19, at exactly 42 weeks, at 7.00 I had an enema and a bladder was punctured. The bubble was squeezed out, there was little water, but it was good and transparent. They pierced me and sent me to twist my nipples so that the contractions would disperse as quickly as possible. The attitude is very good and friendly.

A girl next to me was giving birth in her second labor; they also punctured the bladder at the same time, but her dilatation proceeded much faster and around noon she already gave birth.

Contractions started almost immediately after the puncture, and my whole body immediately began to shake, I don’t know what it was and why, I lost my legs and arms, but for some reason it didn’t scare me. The doctor examined me every hour and a half and informed me about my dilatation. They also gave me a Monica device. It looks like a small phone, hangs around your neck and has suction cups going from it to your stomach. Information about the child’s heartbeat was continuously transmitted via Bluetooth to the doctors’ post. And the doctor, when she examined me, said that everything was fine with the baby.

I tried to lie down or walk; for some reason I didn’t want to sit on the ball. At dilation 6, the doctor said that I needed to take a “medical sleep” because the baby was large and I needed to rest so that I could have strength. The anesthesiologist came and gave an injection in a vein and in the butt, I felt dizzy, but the shaking immediately went away. I didn’t fall asleep, but I dozed off, and the contractions were easier to experience. This lasted about 1.5-2 hours.

When the pushing began, the doctor examined me and said that the baby’s head was tilted to the side, and they strictly forbade me to push, since the baby in this position would definitely not fit into the pelvis. I endured as best I could, and only screaming helped me restrain my efforts. Although before giving birth I told everyone that I wouldn’t scream because I was shy)) I’m so naive))

After some time, Monica was taken off me and connected to a CTG, and an IV was put on. The contractions became very frequent, there was almost no break between them, I looked at the CTG screen, at the numbers, and prayed that the contractions would go away and there would be a break. The doctor said that it was okay to push a little, and it became easier because there was no need to hold back the pushing. The doctor examined me right on the bed and very often. And now she is already saying that brown hair is visible and we will soon go to give birth. At the next examination, she said, let's run to give birth. It was necessary to run to the birthing hall. And we ran, me, the child inside, the doctor, the anesthesiologist with an IV connected to me, and the trainee. A midwife was waiting in the delivery room and neonatologists were also somewhere nearby. I don’t remember how I ended up on the birthing chair. I pushed as hard as I could, but nothing worked, I don’t know how long it took to push, they held my legs because for some reason they moved involuntarily, they pressed on my stomach, but the midwife said that the tissues were spreading and that I had to do it myself. I prayed to myself to give birth on my own, without a Caesarean. But it didn’t work out, a lot of time passed, labor weakened, they twisted my nipples with terrible force, pushing began and my baby was finally born. They took her away, she didn’t scream. I asked why she doesn’t scream? The doctor said that it was difficult for her, just like you, don’t worry, everything will be fine. After some time, I heard the long-awaited scream! They plopped my daughter on my stomach and put her to my chest, then they took me away, they said weight 4200, height 56 cm. Time of birth 19.40. (By the way, I myself am a baby, 161 cm tall and 50-56 kg in weight)

Then they began to stitch me up, there were many external tears and one internal one. The fabrics were very loose and had to be sewn up a lot and for a long time. They held my legs again, because they didn’t want to be apart, they wanted to be together and did everything for this)) They anesthetized me, gave me a drink, and gave me an injection; in principle, it didn’t hurt, it was just cold from the instruments. When they finally stitched me up, I was taken out into the corridor on a gurney and left there for two hours to control the bleeding. And they put on an oxytocin drip. The doctor came periodically and pressed on my stomach. I told her about my prenatal thrombocytopenia and asked if she needed to take action. She said that it’s not necessary yet, everything is fine. I asked about the baby, she said that everything was fine too, and that she was not a baby at all))) They brought me a thermometer, 38.2, and told me to give me 2 tablets of paracetomol in the postpartum period. Two hours passed, they brought an envelope with my so little and so much happiness and we were taken to the postpartum ward)

Py.sy.: despite the large number of tears and the inability to sit for a month, I did not feel severe pain in the perineum. There was also no particular pain during uterine contractions; painful oxytocin injections were given a couple of times.

Why do pregnant women have fears on the eve of childbirth?

It would seem, what fears could there be? The process of childbirth has long been studied and disassembled step by step, there are professionals who are ready to come to the rescue at any time, many articles and scientific works have been written on this topic - but still, the mood is darkened by the fear of a future test, the woman stops leading a normal lifestyle, scrolling the same thoughts in my head. The situation clearly requires help.

There may be several root causes:

The so-called “information noise” that comes from the Internet. If previously, in order to get answers to questions, you had to see a doctor or study official medical sources (textbooks, reference books), now all you need to do is go online. And there are a huge number of blogs, posts, discussions and forums on an exciting topic. Half, by the way, are wrong and far from positive. If a woman is suspicious and nervous, all this will bring her unnecessary anxiety.
Changes in hormonal levels.
A couple of weeks before giving birth, the concentration of substances in a woman’s blood that are responsible for preparing the body for childbirth increases. In addition to changes in the physical plane (increased tone of the uterus, softening of the cervix, production of colostrum), mood also changes. A woman becomes either whiny and irritable, or overly active, or apathetic. The level of progesterone decreases, and the amount of estrogen increases - this process causes prenatal anxiety.
Expectation of suffering. After listening to the story of her relative, or reading a popular women's forum describing bloody details, or watching a film with the main character screaming at the top of her lungs, a woman gets scared and expects exactly the same thing for herself. Forgetting that, firstly, medicine has not just stepped forward, but has learned to perfectly curb and suppress the most severe pain with the help of modern drugs. And, secondly, that half the battle depends on your own attitude. What kind of comfort can there be if you expect torment every second, lose your mind from fear and stop listening to people trying to help?
The unknown. No one is immune from accidents, you need to know this. But remember also that by following the recommendations of specialists and taking a responsible attitude towards the processes occurring within yourself, you can avoid a good half of the problems.

What fears do expectant mothers have?

What is a woman most afraid of before giving birth?

I can't handle it

Since it is nature that gives women the ability to give birth, it also gives them enough strength to do so. It will be useful to take classes for pregnant women, read several special medical brochures, talk to a midwife and a woman who will not intimidate, but share her experience.

What if I start giving birth at the most inopportune moment?

This is exactly what happens in films: a woman instantly bends over in pain, no matter where she is, and gives birth literally in half an hour, without having time to get to the hospital. But this is the exception, not the rule. The process takes several hours; from the first contraction to the expulsion of the fetus, enough time passes, and it is quite enough to get to the parental home. And the rupture of amniotic fluid is a painless and natural process, so it should not be ashamed.

I'm afraid that my appearance will deteriorate

If you try, you can relatively quickly lose extra pounds, restore skin elasticity, and get your muscles back in shape. Special exercises, diets, and, in extreme cases, plastic surgery will help with this.

Adding to the above the fear of being in an unattractive position in front of your spouse, the fear of spontaneous defecation, responsibility, loss of control over the situation, death, we get a real phobia.

REFERENCE!

Tokophobia is one of the identified phobias, which is based on the fear of childbirth and the birth of a baby. This is no longer just fear - due to phobia, a woman can completely abandon the role of a mother, try to commit suicide, or provoke an abortion. Primary tokophobia is characteristic of inexperienced women who have not given birth before. The reason for the appearance of such a misfortune may be a negative attitude that was once laid down, sexual violence, peculiarities of upbringing, a bad economic situation, and the like. A secondary phobia appears in women who already have children. In this case, one’s own negative experience and age after 40 significantly influence.

A nervous expectant mother may struggle with nausea and loss of strength, aggression, dizziness, loss of appetite and sleep. This affects, first of all, the child, so things should not be left to chance.

Fear of rebirth

Even a small health problem during the first pregnancy, and even the first birth itself, which is rarely simple, subsequently causes fear of the second birth.

One day a woman realizes: “I want a second child.” When making this important decision, it is necessary not only to wish for the birth of a new family member, but also to overcome the fears that accompany expectant mothers who decide to give birth a second time.

The fear of re-birth is due to the fact that the woman has already gone through the difficult process of giving birth to a child, experienced labor pain and, possibly, suffered some complications. Of course, fear in such a situation is completely justified. Although there are also mothers who are ready to go to the maternity hospital for the second time, almost immediately after the birth of their first child.

The main fears experienced by a woman who is planning to give birth for the second time are similar to the fears of those who are giving birth for the first time:

fear of pain;
fear of dying during childbirth;
fear of giving birth to a sick child;
fear of gaining weight.

How to cope with fear of childbirth?

Choose one of the options: either you try to collect as much information as possible about the process, or you don’t read anything at all. Knowing that you will certainly be drawn to scary stories, put off studying for a while and go with the flow. But if you know how to control yourself, find out, ask and carefully weigh other people’s words.
Drive away the thought that childbirth is definitely a hell of a pain. Everyone has their own pain threshold and some experience a minimum of unpleasant sensations that cannot even be called pain. For your own peace of mind, arrange for high-quality anesthesia and learn breathing exercises and practice meditation. It is useful to go to the pool, fitness and yoga for pregnant women.
Create at home a special atmosphere of cozy waiting for your son or daughter. While decorating a children's room, sewing or handicrafts, you can throw unnecessary thoughts out of your head. If your physical condition allows, take walks and trips to interesting places.
When preparing for childbirth, choose a maternity hospital and an obstetrician in advance, discuss all the points that concern you. You must trust these people and listen to them during the process.
Prepare a bag with things for the maternity hospital so you don’t waste time running around later. Find a car that will take you if necessary. Agree with loved ones for support. For some women, the presence of a spouse or mother at the birth is important - this issue is also decided in advance.

IMPORTANT!

Do not prescribe sedatives or sleeping pills without first consulting your doctor. Don't try to relieve stress by drinking or smoking. Don't take other people's negative experiences to heart. Strive for beauty, as the ancient Chinese advise: surround yourself with enchanting aromas, beautiful interior items, listen to pleasant music and read good books.

When is the help of a psychologist or doctor needed?

If a woman cannot cope with her nerves on her own, she can seek help from specialists: a doctor or psychologist. The doctor will give a detailed description of the process at any time, but it’s unlikely to be possible without a psychologist.

The psychologist, after talking with the patient, determines her level of readiness for childbirth. There are three of them in total. The first and second are characterized by suspiciousness, aggressiveness towards the child’s father and the child himself, fear, lack of objective assessments, and lack of self-confidence. It is these patients who need to be provided with preventive care in the form of a set of measures aimed at removing negative emotions. The complex may include: assistance from psychological consultants; referral to school for expectant mothers, art therapy and music therapy.

IMPORTANT!

Both during pregnancy and during childbirth, the baby subtly senses your mood and its slightest fluctuations. By remaining cheerful, cheerful, and active, you give your baby positive emotions, as a loving mother should do.

Conclusion

The great mystery - the conception and birth of a new person - is a mystery no less amazing. But this is a natural process that has been overcome by billions of women. Imagine what a joy it is to touch your child for the first time, so long-awaited and beloved. For this, it is worth pulling yourself together and overcoming fear.

Especially for

— Elena Kichak

Instructions

The unknown is very scary. Childbirth is an unpredictable process. For those who are giving birth for the first time, everything is exciting, because it is unclear what awaits them outside the doors of the maternity hospital. You can relieve your anxiety by familiarizing yourself with the birth process. Nowadays it is easy to find literature on this topic or information on the Internet.

Choosing a good obstetrician and maternity hospital will help you relieve the anxiety associated with providing medical care at a crucial time. The opportunity to get to know your doctor in advance, the confidence that he knows the specifics of your pregnancy and is ready to give you the attention you deserve, is reassuring. Choosing a maternity hospital is also very important for your peace of mind. After all, you must be sure that you will receive competent medical care and all the conditions for a successful delivery. Each region has its own popular medical institutions. Often girls share their impressions about them on local forums. Some maternity hospitals organize excursions for expectant mothers to make their decision easier.

The most frightening thing is the severe pain that inevitably accompanies childbirth. In the modern world, a way to avoid it has been invented - spinal anesthesia. But this invention of modern medicine is not used in all Russian maternity hospitals and is not available to all women in labor. It is impossible to lower the sensitivity threshold with the power of thought. You can only calm yourself down with self-hypnosis. Pain warns the body of danger. That is why man is so afraid of her. During childbirth, pain is natural. She comes to bring your baby into the world. This is only part of the process, which will be followed by great joy - the opportunity to see your child. As you think about the pain that comes with delivering a baby, focus your thoughts on the joy you will experience at the birth of your baby. Think about your child, imagine his smile and the feelings you will experience. And during childbirth, in the most difficult moments, think about the child. It's difficult, but it works because at that moment you are distracted.

Often anxiety is caused by the thought that labor may begin suddenly in an unexpected place, and you will not make it to the hospital in time. It is only in films that a child is born right in a car or train, without waiting for medical help. As a rule, labor lasts 16-18 hours. This time is enough to get to your maternity hospital. Rapid labor is very rare, but it also takes 1.5-3 hours.

note

Helpful advice

Sometimes disturbing thoughts become extremely intrusive and you find it difficult to get rid of them. Usually at such moments thoughts fly through your head at lightning speed, replacing one another. A certain fuss and nervousness is created. Try to slow down the flow of thoughts at this moment. Relax and take a few deep breaths. Shift your gaze to some neutral object. Now think about something good. Remember yourself as a child or your wedding day. Let it be an abstract, but very good memory. Redirect your gaze again and return to the good memories. This simple technique will allow you to take your mind off anxious thoughts.

Pregnancy is the most long-awaited and amazing period in the life of any woman. Approaching the moment of the birth of the baby, the feeling of excitement in the pregnant woman increases. Thoughts about childbirth are common to expectant mothers while they are waiting. They are often of a negative nature due to the woman’s fears when she approaches an important date. To ensure a fear-free pregnancy, you need to prepare properly. With some effort, you will stop wondering how to overcome your fear of childbirth.

Tokophobia (fear of childbirth in a pregnant woman) is one of the types of phobias, which consists of inexplicable anxiety, fear of childbirth and changes in connection with the birth of a child.

Every woman experiences fear of childbirth. This is a normal reaction of any pregnant woman, regardless of whether it is the first birth or a repeat birth. But due to the appearance of tokophobia, a real phobia, a woman can refuse motherhood, provoke an abortion, have difficulty conceiving, or attempt suicide.

Tokophobia can be primary or secondary. Primary appears in women who have not previously given birth. Fear can arise due to negative ideas formed in childhood and adolescence, sexual abuse, physical harm, improper upbringing, poor economic conditions and other reasons.

Secondary tokophobia is characteristic of women who have had childbirth experience. In this case, the difficulties they have gone through, rumors about repeated births, age and other factors can shape women's fears.

In addition to the swarm of thoughts that plague the expectant mother, tokophobia manifests itself as nightmares, anxiety, panic, depression, aggression, loss of strength, excessive sweating, nausea, vomiting, dizziness, and loss of consciousness.

What are pregnant women afraid of before giving birth?

A pregnant woman reacts to fears and uncertainty in the future based on her existing experience, or from what she has heard from friends. In both the first and second cases, you cannot bring the situation on yourself, be afraid of complications or repetitions of troubles. However, fears make themselves felt.

Fear of the birth process is natural for most women. This is especially true for firstborns. A woman who will become a mother is afraid of not recognizing the first contractions in time; it seems that the birth of the baby will take place on the way.

The main fears of women giving birth for the first time:

Don't get to the maternity hospital.
Contractions will begin in a public place.
The baby will be in pain during labor.
There will be no one nearby at the right time to help.

Such experiences are natural, but there is no need to panic. From the moment of the first contraction until the birth of the child in the first birth, at least 8 hours will pass:

the duration of contractions that can be tolerated is 4-5 hours;
a period of intense strong contractions, more often than 5 minutes - 2-3 hours;
pushing – 30-50 minutes.

Ultrasound, screenings and other methods of diagnosing the baby’s health during the period of intrauterine development do not give 100% results.
There remains 1-2% for non-standard situations. Such insignificant percentages of research error give cause for concern to the expectant mother. Even after conducting a lot of research regarding the child’s condition, she will worry about his well-being and health.

This fear will remain with the mother for several months after giving birth. Psychologists say that fear for the child’s health persists in the first 3 months after birth. This behavior is due to the intense production of hormones. Some time after delivery, hormonal levels stabilize.

The first encounter between mother and child is breastfeeding. At this moment, the baby and mother exchange hormones, and the child himself receives the first drops of nutritious and much-needed colostrum.

The fear that milk will not arrive, or that it will not be enough, is also inherent in the level of maternal instinct. In order to normalize lactation it is recommended:

maintain proper nutrition;
do not expose yourself to stress;
refers to lactation as a pleasant and natural component of motherhood.

If you follow the recommendations, there will be enough milk.

The existing fear of not being able to cope with your responsibilities as a mother is also quite natural, and every mother who gives birth for the first time or again faces it.

Experiences of first-time mothers:

there is no experience, knowledge and practice to provide the baby with what he needs;
how to understand what the baby wants;
how to determine what hurts him.

Women giving birth repeatedly worry that they will not be able to provide full attention to their newborn. This is due to the presence of other children in the family who also need their mother’s love and care.

Why do pregnant women have fears on the eve of childbirth?

Before thinking about how to overcome the fear of pregnancy and childbirth, it is worth understanding the reasons for its occurrence. Fear of childbirth occurs due to:

release of hormones;
physiological changes occurring over 9 months;
stories about the births of other women, told in real life or on the Internet;
lack of knowledge;
lack of consultation with an experienced, reputable specialist;
previous bad birth experience;
negative experiences of going to hospitals;
sexual traumas suffered;
insufficient material security;
environment;
psychological immaturity during early pregnancy;
physical injuries and illnesses;
accidental pregnancy;
absence of a man nearby.

According to psychologists, the primary causes of prenatal fears are in the early period of a woman’s development. Often, as a girl or child, she receives information from the outside about childbirth and the birth of a child - sources say that this is a danger that promises numerous problems. these thoughts arise and form entire groups of phobias that she will have to overcome, because this is important for her and the unborn child.

Fear of pain

The most common thing among expectant mothers is that it hurts a lot! Of course, childbirth is an indescribable process. Pain, fear, anticipation, and happiness are intertwined here. Pain is one of the integral components of childbirth. Some expectant mothers have a low pain threshold, and for them this process occurs without any particular discomfort. But for women with high sensitivity, childbirth causes very severe physical and emotional stress. But even this can be endured. After all, very soon you will see your baby! For this you can be patient and try! Many women say: “Why us? Why not men? It’s just that our stronger sex is not given the opportunity to experience the feeling of happiness that we experience when giving birth to a child! How wonderful it is when, after so much suffering, this little lump that you have been carrying for so long is placed on your chest. And what a relief to realize that all this is over, and now there are not two of you in the world, but three! The pain is quickly forgotten, only the memory of how hard it was remains. But it soon wears off.

Advice from MirSovetov:
Take your husband or someone close to you, such as your mother, to the birth. Who else but they can support you during this difficult period. It is not necessary to be supported by words and actions, it is important to look into the eyes that understand you, and this makes it easier. Perhaps your husband will not want to go this route with you, citing fear or fear of losing sexual attraction to you. Explain that if he wants, he can stand at your head, and he won’t really see everything that happens. The most important thing is that your husband will provide invaluable support and share with you the first happy moments of the birth of your baby.

MirSovetov also reminds you that you can also use anesthesia. There are medicinal and non-medicinal methods of pain relief. They provide comfortable conditions for a woman giving birth, and also allow her to avoid pain and stress, and disruption of labor. Seek advice from your gynecologist, he will tell you which method may be right for you.

What fears do expectant mothers have?

Depending on a woman’s physiological characteristics, upbringing, cultural content, environment, position in society, level of income and other factors, she develops a number of fears before childbirth. The main ones include:

fear of pain;
fear of being late to the hospital;
fear of premature birth and bad doctors;
fear of the possibility of a cesarean section and the procedure itself;
if involuntary bowel movement occurs;
fear of remaining helpless, losing control over the situation;
fear of spoiling your appearance;
how will I work later?
how will I manage everything;
fear of responsibility;
fear of losing oneself;
if I can't cope with childcare;
if postnatal damage to the child occurs;
suddenly labor doesn’t start at all;
if I'm a bad mom;
suddenly my husband stops loving me;
fear of major life changes;
phobias of postpartum complications;
fear of death, etc.

How to overcome tokophobia?

In nature, everything is planned wisely; such a complex process has its own “natural” pain relief. At the moment of the end of labor, a large dose of joy hormones - oxytocin and serotonin - is released into the blood of the woman in labor. For this reason, after the entire process, a woman’s memory does not remain a feeling of pain or memories of the torment she endured.

Here are tips on how to overcome your fear of childbirth.

Study the issue - read literature about childbirth, the Internet and the availability of various printed literature will help you become fully familiar with the topic of childbirth and thoroughly prepare for upcoming events.

Contact specialists for advice. They will answer any fears in detail and advise ways to overcome them. For example, you can contact psychologist-hypnologist Nikita Valerievich Baturin, who will help you get rid of tokophobia.

A good solution would be courses for expectant mothers. You will be able to gain practical skills and communicate with women who have faced similar problems.

Take meditation courses. They will help you overcome the fear of childbirth, relax, and find harmony. Meditation can be done at home.

Don't listen to scary stories. Especially often, horror stories can be heard from women who have little understanding of the issue, but love to talk, or from those who, unfortunately, were unlucky with childbirth. Don't be too impressionable. You have time, use it to your advantage and can properly prepare for the process.

Don't keep your fears of childbirth to yourself. They arise in a matter that is little known to us. Do not pretend that you are not afraid of anything, it is better to expose your fears and work through each one. Be prepared for the upcoming event.

Don't be afraid of postpartum "disfigurement." There are many exercises that will help you quickly put your body in order and restore the elasticity of your skin and muscles. The beauty industry has created a variety of products to create an ideal figure. Look at the stars of show business, many gave birth, but were able to recover.

Don't be afraid to be late. Contractions are a precursor to labor and usually last from several hours to a day. During this time, you will have time to get to the maternity ward from anywhere.

Don't be afraid of maternity leave. The birth of a child is the most beautiful stage in the life of every woman. The development of a child will be very exciting for the first 1.5 years of life, and then you can find ways to properly organize your time, devote the free minutes and hours to your own development, if you wish, you can do work at home, complete training courses, get additional education or improve your qualifications.

Cheer yourself up. Having more confidence won't hurt you. A person is always able to cope with the circumstances that overtake him. Prepare, concentrate - everything will work out.

Do something that excites you. Any pleasant hobbies will help you distract yourself and calm your nerves.

Do exercises for pregnant women - you should do it a little every day.

Having followed all the tips listed above, you will stop wondering how to overcome the fear of childbirth. You will be able to fully welcome the happiest moment of your life.

What do psychologists say about what the fear of childbirth is and how to overcome it?

Like a natural life process. Do not perceive your situation and the upcoming birth as a feat, this is a natural process that billions of women have overcome. And don't take it as something negative. Nature has taken care of everything; at the end of childbirth, you will experience a feeling of immense joy from the release of a large dose of happiness hormones.

Career women should look at the process of pregnancy and childbirth as work that needs to be done. In this case, the woman works on self-control, because her condition affects not only her, but also the child.

For those who tend to think in terms of overcoming challenges and improving themselves, consider that pregnancy and childbirth are just that. At the end, you will not only receive a prize, but you will also surpass yourself, be able to develop and become something greater than yourself.

Collective activities and communication with similar pregnant women in a limited dose will help you understand how to cope with the fear of childbirth. Realizing that there is someone with similar problems, it is easier for a pregnant woman to understand herself and cope with her condition.

An experienced specialist will help to cope with the problem, but the key role is played by the future mother’s own work on herself.

What should you abstain from when eliminating the fear of childbirth?

Having figured out how to overcome the fear of childbirth and started taking action, you need to eliminate some unnecessary factors from life that can be unsafe for a woman and her baby. Not recommended:

use of medications not prescribed by the observing specialist. It is better not to self-medicate, including not taking plant-based medicines. Any substance during pregnancy can cause an allergy in the pregnant woman, which will negatively affect the baby;
drinking alcohol and smoking to relieve stress. Remember that there is a baby inside of you that can be extremely negatively affected by these actions;
Read too much negative stories and facts from medical practice about problematic childbirth. Try to dose out information about childbirth, concentrate more on positive information, ways to solve various difficulties that arise. Don't take others' negative experiences to heart. What happened to others will not necessarily happen to you;
watch negative TV shows and read negative news in the press, especially about pregnancy and childbirth;
listen to the stories of other pregnant women, acquaintances, colleagues, friends about someone else’s or personal negative experiences. Don't surround yourself with negativity. In ancient China, from the very beginning of pregnancy, a noble pregnant lady was taken from her usual home to a special room, where until the birth she was surrounded by beautiful interior items, pleasant aromas, music, flowers and a favorable harmonious background. They tried not to disturb her in any way until the birth of the child. Take advantage of the wisdom of the ancient Chinese - take care of your surroundings.

It is not enough to simply take care of how to overcome the fear of childbirth; you need to strengthen the achieved result and make sure that it does not happen again. Instill more confidence that you can handle it, everything will work out for you. Read more literature, consult with specialists, take a walk before bed. Don't let your fears of childbirth take over.

Complications during childbirth

Even if a woman is healthy and the pregnancy proceeded normally, it cannot be guaranteed that no problems will arise during childbirth. One of the most dangerous complications of this kind is uterine bleeding, in which a woman can lose a lot of blood in a short period of time, which becomes the cause of death.

Both rapid labor and weakness caused by decreased uterine tone can lead to bleeding. The last complication most often occurs in multiple pregnancies, polyhydramnios, and in those who have given birth more than five times.

Serious complications that can lead to death of both the child and the mother are placenta previa, which covers the cervix, and incorrect placenta previa (transverse, oblique). With all these violations, natural childbirth will not lead to anything good; a caesarean section is necessary.

Such disorders can only be reliably diagnosed using ultrasound. Some pregnant women refuse ultrasound, believing that this diagnostic procedure disrupts the normal development of the fetus. In reality, there is no evidence of harmful effects on the fetus during ultrasound, and the complications that can be detected with it can be serious.

To avoid complications during childbirth, including fatal ones, a woman should be observed by a gynecologist throughout her pregnancy, follow all his instructions, and undergo all necessary examinations (ultrasound, laboratory tests) in a timely manner. It is completely unacceptable to try any new untested obstetric techniques at home or to “try on yourself.”

Every pregnant woman experiences anxiety when thinking about the upcoming birth. This process frightens not only the pain that the mother experiences during childbirth, but also the possibility of complications or birth injuries to the child. Childbirth without fear is quite possible if you prepare for it correctly.

Tokophobia - fear of childbirth

The support of the child's father or close people can to some extent calm the woman, but there are cases when work with a psychologist was urgently required to prevent causeless anxiety and emotional exhaustion in its wake.