I lost my job. How to survive this and find a new one?

How to look for a new job after being fired

1. Remember that you will go through several stages after losing your job:

• shock – 1-2 months,
• optimism – 2-6 months,
• pessimism – 6 months – 1 year,
• fatalism – more than a year.

In the first months, you will “digest” the current situation. Having finally gotten used to being fired, you will begin to look for a new job with optimism. If the search process drags on for six months or more, then gradually your rosy expectations will begin to dissipate and pessimism will appear. And after a year it will transform into fatalism, which will lead to the cessation of attempts to find employment.

It depends only on you how many stages you will have to go through.

2. Analyze your qualities and write them down:

General qualities related to work: efficiency, learning ability, etc.;

• if the work is related to people: communication skills, sociability, etc.;
• if the work involves paperwork: perseverance, attentiveness, etc.

General qualities: friendliness, punctuality, etc.

Hobby-related qualities: love of sports, for example.

This list will help you identify your positive and negative qualities. It will give you the opportunity to evaluate yourself, and if you wish, you will be able to adjust something in yourself, and this will be a definite bonus when looking for a job. In addition, you will be prepared for interview questions related to your personality traits.

3. If possible, register with the Employment Center (formerly the Labor Exchange).

What you can get from this:

• Unemployment benefits (if provided).
• Suitable vacancies will be selected for you and, perhaps, you will find a suitable job.
• If you wish, you can take advanced training or retraining courses.
• Psychological assistance from specialists who will tell you how to survive job loss with minimal losses.

4. Decide for yourself what you really want:

• find a new job as an employee in the same specialty,
• retrain,
• open your own business,
• become a freelancer,
• don't work at all.

Depending on the option you choose, take action.

4. Really look for a job, don't just talk about it. Try all possible methods:

• through friends, acquaintances;
• searching for work on the Internet;
• with the help of the Employment Center,
• through free recruitment agencies.

The main thing is not to despair and strive for your goal, since it is easier to survive the loss of your job if you are busy with real work.

Advice from a psychologist for pensioners and people of pre-retirement age

The worst thing to lose your job is for those who have very little time left before retirement. The reasons for leaving a job may vary, but you need to make sure that they are legal.

By this time, a person has accumulated vast experience, perfected his skills and is well versed in his field, but employers prefer to hire young people. This situation is especially difficult for women.

At an older age, they no longer think about what field they want to work in, since everything has already been decided long ago and it is too late to change anything. You need to analyze your skills and knowledge, and then determine the industry where they may be most in demand. You can find a suitable vacancy with the help of neighbors, acquaintances and even former colleagues. The latter are especially valuable in this regard, as they continue to move in the right professional circles.

You also need to pay attention to your appearance. During the interview, you should be friendly and confident.

At the same time, you need to be prepared for refusal. You can hear “no” many times, so there is no need to despair and fall into the blues. Try not to lose your fighting spirit and remember the power of persuasion.

Today, the main requirement for a potential employee is the ability to work on a computer. Therefore, you will have to master this skill if you are applying for a good position.

Psychotherapeutic assistance

Depression due to lack of work is psychogenic in nature, that is, it is based on external circumstances. The main assistance in this case is psychotherapeutic, which can be provided by an experienced psychologist or psychotherapist. A person defines this state when he realizes that something is wrong with him as before. If something made him happy, it stopped bringing him joy; before, he enjoyed delicious food, but now it brings him nothing but temporary satiation, and so on. When this awareness appears, then you need to contact a psychologist.

Psychocorrectional work is aimed at overcoming any fear. In the context of such a state, this may be overcoming the fear of interviews (increasing the sense of self-confidence), fear of changing your usual life, fear of not being in demand, and others. In this case, different psychological directions are used.

Gestalt therapy

This approach is based on the fact that the human psyche perceives everything holistically. Depression due to lack of work activity (hopelessness, fear of interviews) is considered from the point of view of unfinished action. The psychologist offers to play out a specific situation related to being fired or hired, and guides the person on what happens to his feelings at each stage of the playback.

Psychoanalysis

An analysis of internal desires, aspirations and interests takes place. Along with this, the psychotherapist helps a person understand the reason for failures in finding a job. During the consultation process, in order to achieve a therapeutic effect, a person must have an insight - an insight, that is, he, with the help of a psychoanalyst, discovers for himself the causes of fears and failures, and also determines ways to solve the problem.

Cognitive psychology

During the consultation process, the psychologist identifies internal attitudes that prevent a person from finding a job, accepting himself, developing skills and self-confidence. When a client receives information about himself (for example, he was not hired after an interview), he may perceive it incorrectly, and destructive, irrational beliefs arise.

The task of a psychologist working in this direction is to teach the client to solve the problem constructively. With the help of specific exercises a person learns to think realistically. The most famous technique is to describe the problem, for example: “I can’t find a job because...” A person describes the reasons, what scares him about them, then learns to work with the given facts, acquiring the skills to refute negative ideas. Thus, the symptoms of depression go away.

The essence of the disease and its manifestations

Depression occurs quite often in medical practice. It is a mental disorder in which mood decreases, apathy occurs, and the thought process is disrupted. The reason for this could be a variety of factors. This could be the birth of a baby, a serious illness, moving, problems in your personal life and much more.

Some people simply experience sadness, depression, melancholy, suffering as a result of problems, but all these feelings are normal and cannot be considered depression. These sensations go away on their own and do not require medical intervention. Depression, on the other hand, is a more persistent disorder that undermines not only the moral, but also the physical side of a person.

Few people may believe it, but depression from work also exists. Its essence lies in the fact that the employee does not want to see his colleagues; communication with them does not give him any pleasure, but on the contrary causes irritation.

Negative factors that can cause psychological exhaustion include:

• Anxiety. A person is very worried because the job brings in little money, there is no career growth, and if he is fired, he is afraid that he will not be able to find a new job, that this will lead to big problems in life.
• Anger. At the same time, the patient experiences many negative moments at work, for example, he is angry because of the huge list of responsibilities that are difficult to cope with, because of the bad attitude of his superiors, because of the insufficient performance of his duties by colleagues.
• Decreased self-esteem. This factor manifests itself when management underestimates the employee’s capabilities, does not show proper trust in him, and interferes with the fulfillment of his duties.
• Diffidence. This feeling accompanies a large number of people and greatly interferes with their ability to live and work normally. An employee is afraid to offer something new at work, because he fears that he will not be understood or underestimated. He also terribly does not want anyone to know about his weaknesses, fearing condemnation and ridicule from his colleagues.

Be better than yesterday

In modern society, it is more difficult for a certain category of people to get a job than others. These are students who have just graduated from universities, young women, people with disabilities and teenagers. This category of people often sits without work for many years. Unemployment was, is and will be. But not for you! Be better, more confident and stronger than others. Here are some useful tips from psychologists:

• Look after yourself. A neat appearance and good physical shape will be a good help at an interview. Perhaps this will determine your future destiny.
• Become more confident. The more often you show reasonable initiative, the faster you will achieve your goal and win the respect of those around you.
• Get rid of prejudices. It is unknown who planted the idea in a person’s mind that asking for help is a sign of weakness. Asking for help, first of all, means a person’s desire to learn something new from someone who understands the problem better. A psychologist can always help you cope with depression or its consequences and give competent advice, so don’t be afraid to turn to him for help.
• Don't stand still. Evolution is the engine of progress, so never stop there and look for yourself, gaining new knowledge. The more knowledge you gain, the more professional areas you will be able to find application for.
• Don't stop searching. Never forget that you are looking for a job. When going about your daily activities, do not forget about the goal you are going towards and achieve it.

Here.

How to overcome depression from unemployment yourself, the main stages

The main task in the fight against depression during unemployment is to understand the cause of this condition. Often, we confuse the fear of not finding a job with the wrong choice of profession. It seems that a person’s path is haunted by only failures, but it turns out that he just needs to look around and choose another activity.

Simple and effective recommendations will help you remove the veil from your eyes and look at the world with sober eyes. Many people are afraid of the fear of the unknown. What if it will always be like this, maybe you won’t be able to find a job all your life? The brain draws colorful pictures that are nothing more than fear.

By working through such situations, without fear, without worrying about the future, we create stable stereotypes that help us cope with depression;

Positive thinking really helps. No one will feel better if you walk around in a sad state and worry about the lack of work. First of all, active actions and an attitude towards a positive outcome will move you forward and prevent you from thinking about the negative.

Come up with a clear action plan. If you recently lost your job, you may want to give yourself a short break and continue looking for a new position. When you've been looking for a suitable job for more than six months and haven't gotten any results, it's time to make a list of goals.

Consider these points first:

- study all the main job search sites and highlight key advertisements for yourself;

— create the perfect resume and cover letter (we discussed how to do this in detail in previous articles);

- go to the interview with strong confidence in your abilities and don’t be afraid of anything.

These simple but effective rules will help you on your way to overcoming depression associated with job loss and unsuccessful searches for a new job. The main thing to remember is that you don’t need to give up and fall under the influence of fear.

How to get your husband out of depression ↑

After divorce

Divorce is a dramatic outcome of a relationship. At first glance, it may seem that only women are worried about the current situation. They cry, sob and for a long time cannot come to their senses and start life from scratch.

However, men also experience extreme stress and deep depression after divorce. They, no less than women, experience a feeling of fear and excitement. Many men invest not only money, but also their souls in their other halves, and instead of giving back, they get a divorce.

Hurt male pride does not give him peace. Feelings such as despair, despondency, disappointment, apathy, and melancholy become your best friends.

It’s not for nothing that the saying “knocks out a wedge with a wedge” is so common. A new relationship will help bring your husband out of depression (his ex, of course). You can be that chosen one. Don't be upset if your loved one is worried about divorce and his ex-wife. Over time, this will pass, and your help during this period will be needed.

What do we have to do:

Surround him with attention, warmth, affection, care and love.

Don't burden him with your problems and don't be gloomy. Be light and joyful

Involve him with you. Become a bright ray of light.

Be proactive. Invite him to take a walk in the park, forest or near the river. Turn his attention to the surrounding natural beauty.

Have fun. Go to the theater, cinema, or cozy cafe.

Give him an animal. If your companion does not have allergies and loves our little brothers, then this will not only be an unexpected and pleasant gift, but also an effective way to combat depression. Taking care of a cat, dog or hamster will allow you to take your mind off your pressing problems.

After losing a job

The reaction can be different and completely unpredictable. Some panic, get nervous, and behave extremely aggressively. Others withdraw into themselves, not wanting to communicate with anyone. Many men fall into deep depression, which can last from several months to several years.

It is dangerous to be in this state for a long time. This can lead to various negative consequences, alcohol addiction, and even serve as a reason for suicide.

If your husband has lost his job and you feel that depression is dragging on, then you urgently need to save your loved one.

How to help your husband cope with depression:

visit a psychotherapist together; buy a good homeopathic remedy (antidepressants); take a walk before bed every day; on weekends, go to the pool, ride bikes together; support and pay attention in every possible way; try to talk less about work, switch the conversation to any other topics; do not let your husband go on a binge; alcohol only makes depression worse; go to visit friends, receive guests at home; try to monitor your husband’s appetite; at this time, a complete refusal to eat, or, conversely, overeating is possible; See if your husband has problems sleeping.

Conflicts with colleagues

You have found the job you have been dreaming about for so long. You enjoy working there, and you enthusiastically carry out all the instructions of your superiors. However, despite this, you don’t get up in the morning in a good mood, and thoughts about work kill any mood in you. Perhaps it's all about the people with whom you share your workspace? Frequent conflicts with employees, disputes, disagreements, and sometimes scandals best moisten the soil on which feelings of depression grow.

But there are no problems for which there is no solution. Sometimes this kind of trouble forces good specialists to leave their workplace and go in search of a new one, which turns out to be very disastrous for the entire enterprise. However, changing jobs is the last thing you should resort to if depression and apathy have overtaken you. The most appropriate thing to do in this case would be to try to eliminate constant conflicts by finding out the reasons for their occurrence. You always have the opportunity to sincerely talk with the person who is interfering with your work, clarify grievances, come to a consensus, or contact your superiors and present them with a fait accompli.

Whatever the reasons for depression at work, the best advice is always a vacation. By taking a short break, you have the opportunity to relax, and then, with a fresh mind and sound thoughts, take the correct and only, in your opinion, solution to the problem.

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Main reasons for job loss

Management must have compelling reasons why it can fire an employee:

1. Inconsistency with the position held (the employee does not cope with the assigned tasks, thereby letting down the team and management);
2. Failure to comply with professional ethics and subordination, appearing at work in an inappropriate manner (without a dress code, intoxicated, etc.);
3. Actions leading to administrative or criminal liability (financial fraud);
4. Reduction of staff (planned or unplanned);
5. Personal conflict with superiors;
6. Retirement age;
7. Temporary or long-term disability (the injury prevents you from going to work for a long time, which raises the question of dismissal or transfer to easier work).

Also, the reason for job loss may be personal reluctance to continue working. This may be a consequence of emotional burnout, which also affects a decrease in self-esteem, motivation and self-realization of the individual.

Symptoms and signs

For the unemployed

Unemployed people experience apathy. They often feel that no one needs them at all.

A characteristic symptom of depression in an unemployed person is anhedonia, that is, the person does not experience joy.

Nothing makes him happy, neither the weather nor what is happening around him. He finds himself, as it were, outside the movement of life. Such a person does not have the strength to look for a job, does not have the strength to write and send a resume, it seems that he has lost all his qualifications and is hopelessly behind the times.

He no longer wants anything, it’s difficult to look for work and get himself in order. In particularly advanced cases, a person may stop maintaining hygiene because he no longer wants anything. Often such people neglect themselves greatly and stop leaving the house altogether out of despondency.

People who don't like their profession

If a person does not like his job, it will be extremely difficult for him to get up in the morning. Often you have to set 10-15 alarms just to wake up. A person can start to get sick from everything.

He may become allergic to a colleague’s perfume, for example. The person will be susceptible to colds.

Thus, the body will protest against hateful work. In addition, a person stops enjoying life and begins to get irritated by everything.

It often seems that there are very stupid clients around who do not understand basic things and generally interfere with work with their stupid questions; colleagues will also seem stupid. All projects will be annoying.

At work, such a tired person will be irritated by everything, even sounds. It will be difficult for a person tired from work to rest. Often a state occurs when after work a person comes home in apathy and just lies there, he has no strength or desire to do anything.

Of course, unlike the unemployed, such people at least somehow take care of themselves and maintain hygiene, but they cannot be happy, they have no strength left.

How to get rid of chronic fatigue and depression? Advice from psychologists will help you!

Recommendations for finding a new job

Write a resume, mentioning acquired skills, knowledge of languages, existing experience or achievements during study, positive personal qualities. View information about vacancies on the Internet, newspapers, and select suitable ones. Contact the companies from the selected vacancies, if possible, arrange an interview. Contact an employment service and/or recruitment agency with a good reputation. When going for an interview, in addition to professional skills, it is important to remember the need for a neat appearance.

If salary comes first, you should use the opportunity that has arisen and take small steps towards the goal, without expecting to immediately get a prestigious and highly paid job. Having a job that does not bring in enough money or a job that is not prestigious is still an effective anti-stress; if it is present, the susceptibility to psychological depression will decrease, which will give strength and desire to develop and look for a more profitable job in the future.

Sources

• https://urazuma.ru/uspekh-i-dengi/ne-mogu-najti-rabotu-chto-delat-depressiya-1.html
• https://tutknow.ru/psihologia/6839-kak-perezhit-poteryu-raboty.html
• https://eustress.ru/depression/depressiya-u-bezrabotnyh
• https://GidPotrebitelya.ru/kak-perezhit-poteryu-raboty/
• https://www.psychologies.ru/standpoint/poterya-rabotyi-srodni-potere-lyubimogo-cheloveka-chto-pomojet-dvigatsya-dalshe/
• https://aif.ru/health/life/7390

Prolonged depression

You have accepted the situation and have no desire to change anything

If a person cannot find a job for a long period, his complex psycho-emotional state develops into depression. Coping with a depressed state is much more difficult; in such a state a person does not want anything. He has come to terms with a difficult situation and refuses to perceive difficulties as a temporary obstacle.

Prolonged depression does not affect a person's self-esteem. A person is ready to put up with difficulties, even if he considers them unfair. Depression develops against a background of severe depression, when there are no ambitions or aspirations. Against the backdrop of constant negativity, new difficulties arise as confirmation that the unemployed person deserves their current state.

Consequences of depression

If seasonal blues or stress go away over time (under the influence of the environment), then depression due to lack of work for no reason does not disappear. Over time, a person’s condition worsens: he becomes physically and mentally ill. Against the background of prolonged depression, hypochondria develops, which causes obvious symptoms. A person gets sick, freeing himself from internal pressure: this is how he finds an excuse for his inaction through illness.

During depression, a former employee lets life take its course. He lacks the instincts of a family protector or breadwinner. He withdraws from the lives of those around him - he is simply not interested in what his family is doing while he is going through a personal crisis. The psycho-emotional reaction decreases, and against the background of chronic fatigue, it seems that the person is completely exhausted.

Depression is more severe among young professionals who have not found a place in life but have been laid off. Low stress resistance and self-esteem form an incorrect perception of oneself as a member of society or a work team. As a result, the young specialist is unable to find a decent job and quickly gives up in the face of any difficulties.

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