Why does my husband refuse to discuss his infidelity?
After the betrayal, your husband decided that he wanted to be with you. You are ready to forgive him, you have accepted him back.
But it hurts you! And you want to talk about it. With him, with the culprit of everything. You want to see that he realizes what kind of wound he caused you. What did you go through because of him? And what are you going through now for his sake?
And he doesn’t want to talk about it. He reacts sharply: “We ’ve already discussed everything. What do you want to hear?
Of course, you are scared that he might leave again.
What makes him behave this way?
Should I get a divorce?
The truth has been revealed, the first thought that arises in a woman’s head is separation. Is it necessary to get a divorce or can the situation be saved? To understand what is best to do after betrayal, you need to understand yourself.
The following questions will help with this:
- Am I living with him only because no one needs me? Perhaps I want this myself?
- Do children really need at least some kind of father?
- Is aggression a manifestation of love?
- Who will take care of you if you get divorced?
Only a strong personality can attract a partner and make both of them happy.
Why doesn't he want to discuss what happened?
You are disappointed in your husband. Now you know that he can lie, and masterfully. If earlier you thought that you would recognize a lie, now every word, every look arouses suspicion. It seems to you that he is cunning, like a spy, and insensitive, like a surgeon. But this is not true.
Yes, I have met super conniving, hypocritical men with a complete lack of shame and morality. In my statistics there are 1 in 30 people. Therefore, most likely your husband is an ordinary person. He also has a soul, feelings that obey generally accepted morality.
Men, in principle, process everything differently. Not because they are insensitive blockheads, but because in our culture it is generally not customary to endow men with emotionality, so any manifestation of “un-male” emotion is condemned by everyone. Especially men themselves, if they find this emotion within themselves. I'll explain now.
The traitor (not one of the 1 in 30) feels:
- Guilt (he understands that you had a hard time)
- Sympathy (the wife’s tear-stained eyes, the smell of valerian in the apartment - clearly about the fact that someone is feeling bad here)
- Shame (the notorious “I realized my mistake”)
- Doubt (do you remember that cheating is a symptom of a relationship disease? The relationship will not be cured by just returning the husband to the family)
- Fear (what if you are now going to torment him with constant reproaches, reminders of the baseness of his act? Or his mistress will harass, persecute, and will not give life to anyone)
Do you think he needs your support?
Oh, what are you talking about! I offer my help in such a situation, you once again emphasize - “ You are a weakling!” You can’t deal with your cockroaches yourself!”
Maybe, maybe. Just give it a deadline.
But he won’t understand it the way you do.
Is it dangerous to use conspiracies against betrayal?
The purpose of the ritual is not to harm your loved one, but to prevent betrayal and save the family. The plot will help the unfaithful spouse find positive qualities in his wife and become interested in her.
Magicians and sorcerers pay attention to the fact that the legal spouse should read the conspiracy against infidelity, because she is concerned about the fate of the children. In this case, higher powers are more likely to help her return her loved one and strengthen the union.
Anyone who wants to use the power of conspiracy to protect their family from betrayal must remember that even simple rituals affect a person’s energy. For this reason, rituals cannot be performed when one is overwhelmed with anger or resentment.
To ensure that your husband never cheats, you don’t need to study signs. It’s better to take care of yourself, become more attractive and well-groomed. Men lose interest in their wives when, under the weight of everyday problems, they cease to be women. And, of course, sex means a lot to the stronger sex. If it is regular and varied, the husband will not want to look at other girls.
Why doesn't my husband want to talk about cheating?
The husband is not particularly eager to discuss his infidelity. Reacts irritably when you start talking about it. Because he understands that he is to blame.
«Shame on you, comrade! This is not how your mother raised you
!”, his conscience tells your husband. Her voice is so caustic, it penetrates your soul. That’s why your husband strives to forget everything quickly. He made his decision. He doesn’t want to doubt that he did the right thing by staying in the family.
Yes, yes, he may still have doubts. Because he also only has one life. And he chooses his own path. He could have made mistakes along the way. He is also scared just like you. Only if the pain of betrayal is added to your fear, then the pain of guilt is added to his fear.
Therefore, the man concentrates on the chance. You gave him this chance. Like a rifle to a military man. That's it, now he will guard the borders of the state. He has a task, he has no time to chat about mistakes. At least with you. He is ready to discuss with you not the past, but the future.
Checking with folk remedies
Potassium permanganate will help you find out about betrayal. When your husband returns home, you need to take his underwear and put it in a basin of water. You should tell your spouse about your intention to find out if he is being faithful. If yes, then the water in the bowl will remain clean; if not, it will acquire a pink tint.
When the husband falls asleep, you need to add a few crystals of potassium permanganate to the basin. If a man has not thought about cheating, then he will not do anything. And the one who has a bad conscience will get up in the morning before his wife to change the water.
Why doesn't my husband admit to cheating?
First, let's figure out what kind of “treason” this is, and what we are accustomed to understand by this word. From a psychological point of view, infidelity is one of the most common problems of married couples, especially those who have lived together for a long time, and implies an extramarital affair. According to most people, this is pure betrayal, for which there is no forgiveness, and because of which one should be offended, swear and get divorced. But, no one, in a fit of emotion, takes into account the fact that betrayal also comes in different forms, and that we are all living beings, and not necessarily, as one, resistant to physical and mental impulses. An experienced psychologist, in order to assess the damage caused by betrayal, will first take into account the closeness of partners or spouses, then the nature of the betrayal, and only then find out the reason. Indeed, by nature, betrayal can only be sexual attraction, or, conversely, carry not only a physical, but also an emotional connection. Accordingly, the presence of an emotional background will cause the traitor to become dependent on his new object of passion, which qualitatively complicates the situation.
Reasons for change.
Psychologists identify seven main reasons why men go “to the left.” The most common is a casual relationship, which does not cause any special emotions or experiences, and is usually not of a regular nature. For the other six types, the basis and incentive for action are the shortcomings of family life, the desire to repeat past sensations and experience feelings, and unrequited love. Just as often, betrayal becomes simply revenge for the same betrayal, after which the husband does not confess and feels a certain sense of accomplishment, which justifies his actions.
Therefore, we can draw a small conclusion that any betrayal, as a crime in its own way, has its own degree of severity, and therefore must have its own punishment. And like any “criminal,” a traitor has the right to admit or not admit his guilt until it is proven.
Was it like that or not?
Speaking about betrayal, namely why the husband does not admit his sins, we should first clarify whether it really happened? Perhaps your husband will not confess because there is nothing to confess. Of course, if you caught him at the crime scene, then, in general, there is no point in saying or explaining anything at that very moment. Well, if this betrayal is just your assumptions. Many attribute ordinary flirting to the category of betrayal. Such a phenomenon as flirting is inherent in everyone’s life, and we use it more or less actively, depending on the situation and the person himself. Cases are not excluded when flirting goes beyond certain limits, but still does not reach the point of betrayal; it turns out to be a “game on the edge”, from which a person also receives certain positive emotions. So maybe your husband is just a gambler, and you just need to add a little game into your family life?
Why doesn't he admit to cheating?
If, nevertheless, betrayal is a clear fact, but the culprit, as before, pretends that nothing happened, what to do in such cases and how to explain such behavior? It is worth understanding that cheating is stressful not only for the one who was cheated on, but also for the one who cheated. Initially, the cheater is in constant fear of “what if he finds out,” and then the next wave of stress hits him when his wife finally finds out. And, as you know, fear and the instinct of self-preservation are more effective than promises to always tell only the truth. This is precisely the pointlessness of the question of why the husband does not want to admit to cheating? The second argument in favor of the lack of meaning is a response question that you should ask yourself: “would you really like to know about cheating?” The majority, of course, will immediately answer “yes,” arguing for mandatory marital fidelity, the absence of secrets between spouses, and so on. But, if you think about it realistically, the betrayal could be accidental and not matter, and then you have to live with it. He could have regretted this for a long time, and as a punishment for himself, not even look in the direction of other women, and after such a desired truth, the collapse of family relationships is possible. Moreover, usually showdowns do not take place without tears and hysterics. Few women have the strength to take everything calmly and simply talk. And men most of all do not like to be the object on which this whole stream of emotions is poured. That’s why they are silent about their adventures, for the safety of the nervous system of both theirs and their wife’s. We should also not forget about public opinion, condemnation by neighbors and other things that often prevent us from living. The usually banal “what will people say” becomes one of the main reasons why women decide to break off relationships. The fear of being put on trial by society, and at the same time losing his beloved wife, is what keeps his mouth shut.
Why does my husband cheat but does not admit to obvious cheating?
Mendelssohn's march, flowers, smiles, tears of happiness, hot kisses... At such moments it seems that eternal love, burning passion and no sadness lie ahead. However, the statistics are harsh; according to surveys, nine out of ten married men have broken their marriage vows at least once and sought outside entertainment.
But it’s rare that a girl predicts the likelihood of her lover’s infidelity and plans her actions in such circumstances before she puts on an engagement ring. Rarely does anyone remember this nuance when signing a marriage contract, with the exception of particularly prudent ladies. Therefore, having learned that our husband is cheating but does not admit it, we are overwhelmed with a wave of disappointment and anger. And so it was believed that it was about your family that they would say “they lived happily ever after.”
Does it change or not?
Previously, for an affair on the side of a cheater, society condemned him, ignored him, contempt, up to and including trial and a death sentence. In some cultures, an unfaithful spouse can still be stoned. Our society is more tolerant and tolerant of such cases. From a moral point of view, infidelity is a vice, but, like crimes, it has a certain degree of severity. Based on the foregoing, the spouse has the right to a kind of “presumption of innocence” if the fact of infidelity has not been proven.
The presumption of innocence is a basic principle of criminal justice, which states: “The accused is innocent until proven guilty.” Originates from the legislation of Ancient Rome, where it was stated: “All accusers must understand that they have no right to bring charges until they are supported by decent and proper witnesses or convincing documents or circumstantial evidence that will be of undeniable force and will be clearer.” day."
We found out the possible reasons why the husband does not admit to infidelity. But was there really adultery? Are you sure that this is not a game of excited female fantasy, suspicion, jealousy? Perhaps this is innocent flirting for the sake of positive emotions or friendly communication? What to do if the husband cheated and does not rush to his legal wife with repentance and pleas for forgiveness?
How to bring it to clean water?
Pay attention to his behavior. If the husband cheated and does not talk about what happened, he is in constant stress, fear of being exposed. Forced to control every word and action, to invent plausible explanations for frequent departures and “urgent” matters. Sensitive female intuition immediately recognizes the tension of the other half. All that remains is to observe and, after waiting for the right moment, push him into a “heart-to-heart conversation” without reproaches, scandal and unnecessary emotions. But first think, are you ready to hear recognition? How do you intend to react so as not to lose face? How not to offend him with causeless distrust, jealousy and suspicion? No one knows your husband better than you. Look for the key to his heart so that you never doubt his loyalty and be able to build a strong family union and live, as in a fairy tale, “happily ever after.”
Sources:
https://www.b17.ru/article/108413/ https://www.allwomens.ru/13665-pochemu-muzh-ne-priznaetsya-v-izmene.html https://obizmenah.ru/zhene/pochemu -muzh-izmenyaet-no-ne-priznaetsya-v-ochevidnoj-izmene.html
Diagnosis of infidelity by burning candles
The betrayal of your significant other can be revealed with the help of a magical ritual. You will need a half-liter jar half filled with salt. Two candles are inserted inside. Being in complete darkness, set fire to both wicks, close your eyes and say the following spell:
“Let the truth be as salty as this salt, but I want to know whether God’s servants (names of spouses) are still in love.”
Opening their eyes, they look at the flames of the candles. It is a bad omen if the lights deviate in different directions. This means that there is no more love between a man and a woman.
