In this article we will tell you how to break up with a man correctly so that it doesn’t hurt too much.
The topic of breaking up with a man is quite relevant, because it is always difficult to do, and even in such a way that you don’t have to regret it. There may come a time in every woman’s life when it is pointless to continue the relationship and it would be necessary to break up. Regardless of who exactly initiated it, it always hurts and needs to be overcome. Let's figure out how to break up with a man correctly and not regret it.
How to survive a breakup with your loved one
Looking at many relationships, it immediately becomes clear that if you break up, they are doomed to break up, and people who break up should understand that nothing bad happened, because it is much worse to be with a person and realize that he is not destined to become your soul mate.
When you have a question about how to tell a young man about a breakup, you should think about the fact that he will become a good husband for someone.
Every person on this planet deserves love and understanding, but what is the point of being in a relationship that causes pain and suffering?
How to alleviate mental anguish, and what words to choose to explain your decision to leave?
How to break up with a married man?
How to break up with a man?
At the beginning of a relationship with a married man, women often don’t even think about what will happen next. He cares, looks after, is passionate in bed and in general he is the best. But over time, you want to equip a family nest, and then it immediately becomes clear that this will not happen to him. After all, for him you are just an opportunity to get away from everyday and family problems. Attempts to talk about life are frustrated by his silence or constant promises that he is about to get a divorce. Maybe he really will get divorced, but in practice this does not happen in most cases.
If you think about all the shortcomings of such a relationship, then over time you will definitely conclude that it is worth breaking up. Yes, it will be difficult to do this, but it is possible.
- To make it less painful, it is better to end the relationship gradually. You must accept the fact that in any case it will remain in the family. So is it worth spending time on it? Maybe it's better to look for your happiness? Gradually begin to move away from your loved one - do not look for a meeting, do not call, try to find a reason to cancel the meeting. Gradually he will begin to understand that you do not need a relationship.
Parting
- Consider what you will say during your farewell conversation and better conduct it in public places. This will avoid too heated conversation, as well as hugs. Calmly say that it is pointless to continue the relationship, because you want a family and a person nearby, but he cannot give it to you.
- After breaking up, don’t focus on the fact that you feel bad without him. Get busy - start building a career, renovate your home, go dancing or fitness. The main thing is, don’t sit alone, try to surround yourself with people. Get ready to meet the one.
- Avoid meeting your lover. Do not go to places where you have been together, and also where he goes himself. Walk around his place of work or residence. Even with an unexpected meeting, old wounds can ache.
- If your lover insists on continuing the relationship, then you should not fall for it. You must be persistent and clearly confident in your own decision. Say that you no longer want to be just a lover, because you are ready for more. If he is not ready to leave for you, then it is better for him to let you go.
- Sometimes men cannot come to terms with the fact that they were abandoned and begin to pursue a woman. In such a situation, do not run away from the meeting, but talk and threaten that if he does not leave you, then his wife will find out about everything. It is unlikely that he will want this and he will give up.
If you leave, don't come back and leave no chance. Otherwise, you will fall into the same trap again.
A balanced and correct decision to break up with a guy (man)
Before you break up with your boyfriend, you need to think things through carefully.
Often problems appear in our lives that become difficult to cope with, but if you look at what is happening from the other side, then everything becomes not so critical.
A decision made in the heat of the moment can change your whole life, most often not for the better, and sometimes you can’t get anything back.
Everyone knows that ideal does not exist and your boyfriend was probably no exception. Everyone’s character is different and a lot of things in it can irritate you, but you cannot change anything, no matter how much you try.
But if you look at everything that happens from the other side, you can find many positive qualities that attracted you to this person and made you fall in love with him.
There are always both negative and positive aspects in everything.
Think about how you will live if this person is not around? Just try to imagine that he is gone forever, that he will never be around again. Are there really so many bad qualities that you can’t even see the good ones?
You shouldn’t rush off the handle, you need to weigh everything carefully, think carefully and only then decide whether to end the relationship.
If at the moment you are consumed by a storm of emotions, then you should postpone making a decision until you calm down.
If you have decided to finally break up, but don’t know how best to tell your guy about the breakup, then listen to our advice.
Who is to blame and what to do?
First of all, immediately after a breakup, you need to give yourself time to think about the situation and the relationship. The main thing is not to get carried away and think through your further behavior. Often, couples who have gone through a breakup reunite in the coming days simply by having a heart-to-heart talk and apologizing to each other. Your goal in the first 24 hours after breaking up is to decide alone with yourself whether you really need to end the relationship or whether what happened was stupidity and a wasted outburst of emotions.
At the same time, we need to think about whether it’s worth putting up with. At the same time, you need to think about not the conflict that led directly to the separation, but the entire relationship as a whole. Moreover, often an insignificant reason for a breakup can indicate serious problems in the relationship.
The main thing is not to forget that no one person can be to blame for a breakup. Both partners always bear responsibility for the relationship. Therefore, do not place all the blame on your partner, think better about what mistakes you made so as not to repeat them in the future with the same or another person.
How to say…?
Going through a breakup is always difficult for both of you. Communicate your decision tactfully, being careful not to hurt the feelings of the person you once loved.
Such words, as a rule, take everyone by surprise, even if there were some problems in the relationship.
Most likely they will try to persuade you not to break up, and to get everything right, but you should not succumb to such provocations if you confidently made such a decision.
When breaking up, you need to try not to be too rude, because in front of you is a living person with his own feelings, and not a soulless machine.
You need to try and explain everything without reproaches and accusations; by breaking off the relationship, you are causing mental trauma, therefore, you should not further aggravate the situation with unnecessary reproaches.
If you feel good about this young man, explain to him the reason why you want to break off the relationship, and why it is his fault to break up.
How to break up with the man you love?
Parting with a loved one
Parting with a loved one is the most difficult thing, but you need to do it with dignity and it doesn’t even matter what the reason was. If both partners are adequate people, then they can act calmly and part less painfully.
If you notice that a man’s feelings are beginning to fade, that you are seeing each other less often, he is supposedly always busy, has become inattentive and indifferent, then the first suspicions arise that he has decided to break up. If this suits you too, then just wait until it disappears on its own.
But it’s better to take the first step towards breaking up on your own, because you respect yourself. Yes, your partner may make attempts to return to the relationship, but still stand your ground and do not cancel your decision. Try to make the parting more beautiful.
- Watch your emotions. When you meet, tell them what feelings and desires overcome you. Assess his reaction and restrain your violent emotions. Try not to hide and be calmer. In a conversation, do not touch his pride and do not get carried away by how great everything was with you.
- If a man has a weak character, then he may begin to press for pity. It is important not to give in to this and insist on your own. Even if he says that you are heartless and callous, still do not give in.
- Express everything at your last meeting. If you don't have the strength to meet in person, then write a letter or call him. Think over your speech in advance so that the man understands that the relationship is no longer and will not be.
- You shouldn’t agree to meet him for the last time. If you hug or kiss, it will ruin everything. Tell them it's over and there's no going back.
- When breaking up, keep in mind that you must control the situation. This will allow you to cope with the breakup easier.
Be Relentless
For some time, after the breakup, your ex-passion may be looking for a meeting with you, calling or asking friends for help.
It is necessary to avoid such communication, completely ignore all attempts and efforts, and not to cross paths again in the company of mutual friends.
Your friends should also understand that you are no longer together, you are now independent people, and talking about your ex-boyfriend is unlikely to be pleasant for you, so warn your friends about this in advance.
In such a situation, it is necessary to put an end to it, and not torment yourself with his endless showdown.
If you continue to communicate, the guy will have hope for the resumption of the relationship, and the longer this hope lives in him, the more painful it will be for him to realize that it’s all over.
Each next break in a relationship should be perceived not as the end, but as the beginning of a new, bright life, and perhaps a better life will come much faster than you think.
Immediately after the breakup
Women need some time after a relationship before they are ready for a new love adventure. However, men seem to behave very differently. They quickly jump from one relationship to another and hastily change one woman for another. From the outside it seems that they do not experience the pain of separation at all. Is this really true?
In fact, it is men who tend to immediately start the next one after breaking up a long-term relationship. It is after an unsuccessful relationship that the desire to start the next one is excessively great. The reason is that men are afraid of being alone.
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Don't part with your loved ones
Sometimes realizing that you are still loved is just as difficult as realizing that you yourself still love. A great way to understand how worthwhile a previous relationship was is to remember how your partner behaved in stressful situations. Of course, not every couple was saved during a plane crash, but you can probably remember how you encountered hooligans, missed the last train, or were caught in a hailstorm. Behavior during such minor stresses best characterizes a person’s personal qualities and his true attitude towards you. If he always showed courage, care and self-sacrifice, behaved with dignity and did not abandon him in difficult times, then it is worth thinking about a second chance for a relationship. After all, a strong and high-quality union can often be destroyed by a sudden outburst of emotions or a stupid misunderstanding.
Be honest with yourself, value your feelings, don’t be afraid to take the first steps, and then you will definitely be able to return your love and save it this time. After all, sometimes the end is just the beginning.
Leaving go
The main thing is not to step on the same rake. Even if he himself was the initiator of the separation and the reason was compelling, sometimes he still begins to suffer from lost happiness.
We must not forget that the relationship between a man and a woman cannot consist of only positive moments, as well as of sheer negativity. Memories of a failed relationship usually contain both the bitterness of grievances and pleasant memories. How else? After all, even an aggressive alcoholic who beats his wife and sells off her things can tenderly hug and give a bouquet of field daisies. Is this a pleasant moment? Certainly! (Especially if it is flavored with nostalgia for the times when love was just beginning). Is this one moment worth all the grief experienced with this person? Of course not!
You need to try to weigh all the pros and cons as coldly and sensibly as possible, to admit that it was not only bad with this person, but also good. You shouldn’t hide from yourself the fact that you miss his affection, sense of humor or support. You need to remember what exactly attracted you during the period of the emergence of feelings, and analyze how similar the image of your loved one is to the person you left.
It happens that there is practically no difference. The person has not changed, but the circumstances and environment have changed. For example, a cheerful joker, the life of the party in a student dormitory, has not changed after 10 years, turns out to be untenable in family relationships, and is not ready for adult life, which requires responsibility and seriousness.
The affectionate romantic, after the candy-bouquet period, slowly turns into a rude and boor. Often this process occurs gradually and stretches over many years. The woman, by inertia, continues to love that gentle and caring man, of whom, in fact, there is nothing left.
In both cases, you must realize that you cannot sacrifice your happiness for the sake of the ghosts of past love. Hidden from oneself in the depths of the subconscious, good memories of past relationships will again and again rush to the surface, causing doubts and feelings of guilt. The main thing here is not to engage in self-deception, not to convince yourself that you broke up with your loved one, because the relationship only brought suffering. On the contrary, you need to accept that there were a lot of good things, to realize that the reason for the breakup was valid and you will continue your further path, armed with invaluable experience.
Do not return to a sadist because of a bouquet of cornflowers, do not tolerate an alcoholic for his sweet speech, know how to distinguish the important from the unimportant. And if the decision to leave was really well-considered, do not regret it and do not provoke your own sentiments.
