Positive thinking: how to quickly switch from negative thoughts?

Thousands of different thoughts flash through our heads every day. And not all of them are positive and joyful. However, if we focus only on destructive thoughts, they will eventually become our beliefs. “I’m a loser!”, “I won’t succeed!”, “Everything is bad!” We begin to believe it. And as you know, thoughts are material. Such thinking creates fear, self-doubt, and leads to failure. If you want to become happy, read the article to the end.

Why are bad thoughts dangerous?

Negative thoughts do not just worsen fate and make a person sick. They reprogram reality in such a way that even those around them unconsciously begin to treat the person with negative thoughts badly. At the same time, a person has more unpleasant events in life, his luck leaves him and he begins to plunge into despondency and a depressive state.

Even after getting out of difficult thoughts, the body recovers in at least a few hours.

Game of resistance

Playing resistance can be fun. My twelve-year-old daughter Lauren and I play this sometimes. One day we go shopping together and just note all the negative statements each other makes. Then we try to speak differently. Here are some examples of our statements:

I said, “There probably isn’t a good place to park here, let’s look somewhere else.” I should have said, “Let’s see if there’s a good place to park nearby.” We then drove to where we wanted to park and found a parking spot.

She said: “I hope we don’t have to wait long; I have so much homework.” Then she corrected herself: “I hope we can get it done quickly. I want to have enough time to do my homework.”

When it was time to leave the store, I said, “Your mom won’t like it if we’re late.” Together we reworked this phrase: “If we return home quickly, mom will be very happy.” Near the house in the car I said: “Don’t forget to take your bag.” In a positive version it sounded: “We will now make sure that we have taken everything.”

Main signs of negative thoughts

Negative thoughts appear in the consciousness of the “victim” in various forms, but identifying them, guided by simple rules, is now not difficult:

Bad thoughts are not associated with real time - they are fruits of the imagination, a kind of projection of the future. Negative emotions contribute to a deterioration in well-being - the pulse quickens, breathing becomes intermittent, and muscles tense. Negative thoughts create the illusion of despair - options for the development of events seem hopeless, while lowering a person’s self-esteem.

If you don't start managing your own thoughts, other people will control them.

Treatment of depression is based on creating a favorable background for internal dialogue. Thoughts arising in the mind give rise, through a chain reaction, to thoughts of a similar emotional hue. Negative energy attracts exclusively negative thoughts, and positive reasoning becomes a springboard for a positive future. Man is the creator of fate, so when creating, you should not pay attention to the features of the outside world. Create an atmosphere in which you feel comfortable staying.

Why does the past repeat itself?

The above is another reason why it is so important to heal old wounds. If you have experienced painful experiences in the past (for example, in business or personal relationships), you will strive to avoid them again. Resistance to suffering may bring it again. However, if you haven't been hurt before, you won't think much about the hurt and will naturally focus on what you want. This is what will be attracted into your life.

Resistance to painful experiences creates the likelihood of experiencing them again.

It is very difficult not to resist the bad things that happen. After a disaster has happened once, we naturally do not want it to happen again. But by focusing on this reluctance, we, to a certain extent, again attract suffering. The more fully we have healed our past, the less we will be bothered by the shadows of the past. Until we get rid of the pain associated with past events, some of their negative aspects will repeat and annoy us.

For example, if we passionately do not want to be alone, that is exactly what we will get. If we don't want to be rejected and ignored, this is exactly what will happen. If we are terrified by the possibility of losing something, it will be lost. If we are depressed by the thought of an unloved job, it will remain a source of trouble. If we simply cannot work with a certain person, we will have to deal with him all the time.

The more we don’t want something, the more it is attracted into our lives.

By learning to heal past wounds, we will allow the old pain to go away, and with it the subconscious expectation of its repetition. From now on, we will be free to focus more on what we want. Our positive desires will increase to the extent that we were able to get rid of past grievances.

If you don't let go of your past, it will appear to you again and again. By resisting negative experiences, you will automatically attract situations that will cause unpleasant emotions. Resistance not only prevents you from attracting what you really want, but also disperses your strength. It's like a hole in your love tank that keeps it from filling. Your energy, instead of being consciously used for constructive purposes, flows out of it.

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As an experiment, try noting all the negative thoughts and bad feelings that you verbally express during the day. You'll be amazed how often this happens. But the “voiced” resistance is just the tip of the iceberg.

Negative statements reflect the true essence of resistance. Our true task is to heal the emotional experiences and sensations caused by it. Start by being aware of what you said.

Be careful what you say. When you gain confidence in creating your life, you will see that what you say comes true. The power of your words is limitless. Especially if you express your true desires.

Causes of negative thoughts

There are several factors and reasons that provoke destructive thoughts in a person.

• Anxiety. Negative thoughts appear when you start to worry that something bad might happen. Or, on the contrary, you think that nothing good will happen to you. This is where your imagination comes in. It paints a vivid picture of your sad future, once you think about the worst case scenario.
• Feelings of guilt and regret. All people make mistakes. Negative thinking develops when we constantly remember them and return to the past. We feel embarrassed and ashamed. We get angry and blame ourselves for doing wrong. But this experience is needed in order to draw conclusions and move on.
• Increased demands on yourself. Overly self-critical people obsess over their shortcomings. They are unhappy with themselves most of the time. And therefore their thoughts are also predominantly negative.
• Problems. Negative thinking forces a person to concentrate on the problems that have arisen. And the person completely forgets about what good he has in life. Destructive thoughts greatly exaggerate the scale of the problem. Instead of thinking about how to cope with difficulties, a person simply becomes depressed.
• Dependence on material things. If your happiness depends entirely on having material goods, then you are a negative thinker. There is nothing wrong with wanting more and striving for it. However, when we focus on what we don't have, we become stressed and anxious. Life begins to seem incomplete, although it is worth paying attention to what we already have.
• Failures. If you have suffered one failure, then you should not transfer your attitude to the entire situation as a whole. For example, being rejected at an interview does not mean that you will not be able to get a job. Failure is a valuable lesson, not a reason for destructive thinking.

Nothing contributes to success like success.

Once you understand this, you will be able to understand why it is so important to define your desires every day. If you make a wish and it comes true, you will feel a surge of strength from the knowledge that you are able to attract what you want into your life. However, small miracles will never happen again if you stop feeling grateful for them. Nothing contributes to success like success. To achieve personal success, we need to feel and act in accordance with our true desires. Unfortunately, most of our daily aspirations are born precisely from the habit of resistance. Such desires are not true. Instead of attracting what you really want into your life, false desires deprive you of energy and strengthen the belief that you are powerless to get what you want.

By focusing on what you don't want, you reinforce your belief that you are unable to get what you want.

Let's say you're stuck in a traffic jam. If you're in a hurry, you want the car to move as quickly as possible. By resisting a traffic situation, you focus on what you don't want, thereby reinforcing your inability to get what you want. Most likely, you will intuitively prefer the lane in which cars move the slowest. And even if you taxi onto a not-so-bad one, you’ll think that it’s the worst of all.

Why (for example, in a supermarket) is the last package of the desired product always taken away from you in front of your nose? Why, when you are in a hurry and worried, do you stand in a line that barely moves? This is not an accident. There is clearly a pattern here. When you are in a hurry and unbalanced, you will choose the slowest line.

If we are in a hurry, then at the supermarket we stand in line, which moves slower than everyone else. Without being in harmony with your inner center, you will unconsciously (“intuitively”) choose the wrong path. By resisting circumstances, we only make the situation worse. By focusing on our unwillingness to wait, we will be forced to wait longer.

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Is it possible to get rid of negative thoughts forever?

Unfortunately, it is impossible to control your brain. Try to erase the memory of being embarrassed in front of your crush in high school. Happened? Hardly. And as a result, trying to suppress the memory only makes it worse: unpleasant thoughts only multiply and return again and again.

Trying to chop off hydra heads in your head doesn't work. But there is good news: negative thoughts when making decisions are actually not a problem.

Thoughts are born in the brain. And some of them will always be negative, because the gray matter lives by the motto “Better safe than sorry.”

Thousands upon thousands of years ago, caveman #1 thought a snake was a stick, got bitten, died, and didn't produce any offspring. Caveman #2, who walked around seeing a snake in every stick, gave birth to many children, and now our brains see problems even where there are none. Thanks to evolution.

But this should not become the reason for wrong decisions and stupid behavior. Your thoughts do not always automatically control your actions. You decide. After all, sometimes you worry, but still make the right decision, right?

Use positive words and expressions

The words and expressions we choose directly affect us and our perception of the world. Using positive words and statements throughout the day will help you stay positive and crowd out negative thoughts. Here are some examples of positive expressions: “I really hope...”, “I expect only a positive outcome...”, “everything will be fine and everything will work out!” And you can start every morning by reading positive quotes or af and “I’m happy, I’m healthy, I’m whole.”

Spiritual laws say that what happens in life is what we believe in, what we talk about most, and what we focus on. So start working with your thoughts today. You have the power to determine what thoughts and events will affect you, and the power to “create” your happiest life. Stop focusing on the negative, learn to let go of the past, surround yourself with positive people, dream big dreams and be grateful for all the amazing opportunities life gives you!

Techniques for getting rid of negative and depressive thoughts

There are techniques to help you get rid of negative thinking.

Technique – cutting.

As soon as you feel that a negative thought has crept into your consciousness, you should simply “cut off” it. There is no need to analyze or argue with it, and there is also no need to defend against it. You just need to cut it off from yourself and put something else in its place. The key principle here is that this must be done immediately, at the very moment as soon as that very thought arose.

Technique – observation from the outside.

This technique consists in the fact that a person does not distance himself from a negative thought, but observes it as if from the outside and does not allow it to take possession of him. Negative thoughts have power over a person if he reacts to them.

The technique is an exaggeration.

When discovering the emergence of negativity in oneself, a person must exaggerate it to the point of absurdity. The key here is to make the negativity funny. A person must catch himself in a negative thought, knowing that consciousness is a great deceiver. Every day the consciousness tries to play some joke. Being observant and noticing it, you need to resort to the technique of exaggeration. This absurdity helps to take away the power of a negative thought, since a negative judgment has power as long as the individual reacts to it.

Technology is confrontation.

Everything that a negative thought dictates to the individual should be turned into its complete opposite. For example, as soon as the consideration “I won’t be able to make a sale” arises, you need to put in its place a contradictory judgment: “I will be able to make a sale.” If an individual comes to the thought “I will never be able to achieve financial success,” one should react with the complete opposite, telling himself: “I will achieve great financial success.”

An individual cannot think about negative and positive at the same time; consciousness is capable of thinking about one thing, and by throwing out the negative from consciousness and putting a positive judgment in its place, the person deprives the negative of its power over itself.

Tonglen technique

An unusual technique for working with negative emotions, specifically irritation. It is borrowed from Buddhism and is called Tonglen.

If someone annoys you, start breathing with concentration and imagine how, as you inhale, you take away from the person what annoys you, their problem or negativity, and as you exhale, you return the energy of love to them. You can return it in the form of golden or red breath.

Of course, the question immediately arises: how can I take away the bad from him and give him the good, what will be left for me then?! But in fact it works the other way around. When you take away from people what annoys you: grief or problems, acceptance of this arises inside, and acceptance is one of the most positive feelings. And you return the energy of gratitude to the person for this acceptance, for the fact that he allowed you to experience it - because without him you would not have felt it.

If you do the practice regularly, you will become calmer, happier, and more friendly. And you will only become more positive.

Negative thinking can trigger depression

If we talk from a scientific point of view, it is also difficult to call despondency something good. Bad thoughts lead to an increase in the concentration of cortisol (stress hormone) in the blood. If this happens regularly, the consequences for the body will not be the most pleasant: the immune system is weakened, muscle mass decreases and is replaced by fatty tissue, sleep and the rhythms of life in general are disrupted (- valtasar.ru).

Dejection causes not only physical, but also mental harm. Having learned to concentrate exclusively on the negative aspects of life, a person begins to miss favorable opportunities. He simply does not notice promising chances and becomes less competitive in material terms and in the sphere of personal relationships. Over time, such an individual develops a reputation as a “chronic” loser.

The conclusion is simple : it is not the one who stumbles and falls who is weak; weak is the one who told himself that he can no longer get up. Don't let your own thoughts break you! 90% of success or failure in any business is in your head.

Books for negative thoughts

Hundreds, maybe even thousands of books have been written on the topic of getting rid of negative thoughts. And many of them offer completely different approaches: from esoteric to psychological. Perhaps our next list will help you find something of your own.

• “How a Man Thinks or the Thinking of a Man” by James Allen.
• “The Power of Now or the Power of Now” Eckhart Tolle.
• "The Silva method. Mind Control" Jose Silva, Philip Miele.
• "Think and Grow Rich" Napoleon Hill.
• "How to Use the Laws of the Mind" Joseph Murphy.
• “Change your thinking and you will change your life” Brian Tracy.
• "Creative Visualization" by Shakti Gawain.
• "Thoughts Matter" David Hamilton.

A person is strong precisely because, with the help of thoughts, he can evoke any emotions and put himself into any state. Need concentration or willpower? You just have to point your thoughts in the right direction and everything will change.

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How to control yourself with the power of thought? Part I

How to control yourself with the power of thought?
Part I

Detecting automatic thoughts

Your thoughts are your children.

You must make each of them beautiful.

Every thought should be a creative force aimed at good.

Always remember that the power of thought is very great.

Prepare to use it to help the world.

In a series of my previous articles, I talked about the influence of thoughts on emotional reactions, bodily reactions and human behavior. The last of them, “Thoughts and Feelings,” urgently demanded its further continuation. This logical continuation is the topic of how to learn to detect automatic thoughts in yourself that lead to dysfunctional feelings, unpleasant or painful bodily symptoms and unconstructive behavior.

What are automatic thoughts?

If a person is specifically busy with something, his thoughts will be mainly focused on this activity, but in parallel with this, the person will have other thoughts that are not related to the specifics of the activity itself. For example, you are reading this article, and part of your consciousness is focused on obtaining new information, you are trying to understand the text. But along with this, you might think, for example: “Will this article benefit me? Perhaps I’m wasting my time and would rather do something else?”

Another example: you are solving some problem or task and are immersed in finding a solution and thinking about exactly this. At the same time, you may have a passing judgmental thought, such as: “This is a difficult problem. I may never be able to find a solution to this problem.” Thoughts like those in these two examples are called automatic thoughts in cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT); “They are not the result of reflection, inference and are not necessarily supported by evidence. On the contrary, these thoughts appear as if on their own; they are often short and fragmentary.” The closest thing to them is the term “side” thoughts.

“Everyone has such thoughts; they come to mind suddenly. We don't consciously "cause" them, which is why they are called automatic. Automatic thoughts are most often fleeting, difficult to catch, and, more often than not, we are only aware of the emotional, bodily or behavioral reaction that follows them. If you start having automatic thoughts like in the example above, “This is a difficult problem. “I may never be able to find a solution to this problem,” then you may become sad or even feel a sense of depression and hopelessness. After which, you may stop trying to solve this problem. Most automatic thoughts are distorted and do not correspond to reality. But we react to them as the ultimate truth” / 1 /. But not all automatic thoughts are distorted.

Automatic thoughts can lead to both functional and dysfunctional feelings; both to comfortable sensations in the body, and to unpleasant, painful ones; to both constructive and unconstructive behavior. If you have other automatic thoughts in the example above, “This is a difficult problem, but I can handle it and gain the necessary experience that will be useful to me,” then you will gain confidence and you will continue to solve the problem.

Automatic thoughts are fleeting, evaluative, short, fragmentary, side thoughts that do not follow from the specifics of the thought process, thoughts that appear as if on their own.

An automatic thought seems to arise from nothing and goes nowhere. Similar to an unexpected shot, when it is not clear who shot and where he was aiming. No one expected this thought, no one called, but she appreciated it and left. But, in fact, there is a reason why they appear. But we'll talk about this later. The main question is how to learn to catch your automatic thoughts, because they determine subsequent reactions.

How to discover your automatic thoughts?

The appearance of automatic thoughts leads to a change in the emotional state, to a change in bodily and behavioral reactions. Therefore, by monitoring your reactions, which is much easier to do than tracking your automatic thought, you can more easily detect the automatic thought itself.

When you feel yourself sinking into unpleasant, dysfunctional emotions, ask yourself, “What am I feeling right now?”

In other words, first determine your emotional response.

Identifying reactions: first identify C

The first thing you need to do to do this is to correctly identify your feeling, emotion or behavior. The key question for identifying your emotion is the question: “What was I feeling, doing, when A happened?”

Emotional reactions and actions have a strong connection. If there was an emotional manifestation, then start by first identifying the emotion.

Below is a table of dysfunctional and functional feelings that will help you do this. It presents the eight most negative feelings that people have most often and which cause people the most suffering.

Table of dysfunctional and functional feelings

Using the table indicated, determine your S. Take a piece of paper and write down this feeling, using the notation S = feeling. It is possible that the life situation in which you find yourself causes you not one, but several feelings at once. Therefore, having defined your feeling, ask yourself the question: “What else do I feel in this situation?” If it turns out that this is not the only feeling, write it down using the notations C1, C2…..Cn.

For example: C1=anger; C2=guilt.

Define event A

Now it’s time to determine event A. To do this, you need to ask yourself the question - what exactly caused C?

For example, the feeling that arose for you is S-guilt. Answering this question, you immediately determine that I feel guilty because, for example, I let a good person down by my actions.

Now you are ready to identify the automatic thought.

Identify automatic thought B

Ask yourself the question - “What did I think, what did I say before I felt S?”

There is a period of time between event A and reaction C when an automatic thought appears. It is this interval that interests you – what you were thinking at that moment.

For example, before you felt guilty, you might have thought, “I did something bad, my action caused inconvenience to a good person.”

If the basic question (“What was I thinking?”) is not enough to identify automatic thoughts, you can use the following additional questions:

1.If I had to guess what I was thinking, what could I guess?

2. Was I thinking about __________ or ______?

3.Did I imagine or remember something?

4.What does this situation mean for me?

5.What does this situation say about me?

• Have you been imagining something that could happen or remembering something that happened before?

You can also try to identify the opposite thought to the one you might have.

People who experience negative emotions make predictable errors in their thinking.

Below is a list of the most common thinking errors people make.

1. Dichotomous thinking (also called black-and-white, polar, or all-or-nothing thinking): The idea that there are only two categories for judging events, people, and actions (black-white, bad-good). Refusal to evaluate on a continuum.

Example: “If I don’t succeed at everything, then I’m a failure.”

• "Catastrophizing" (also called negative predictions): Predicting future events in a purely negative manner, without considering other, more likely outcomes.

Example: “I’ll get so upset that I won’t be able to do anything at all.”

• Devaluation of the positive: successes, positive experiences and actions are not given importance.

Example: “It’s true that I managed to do this job, but that doesn’t mean that I’m capable, I was just lucky.”

• Emotional reasoning, the belief that something must be true just because you “feel” (essentially, believe) it so strongly that you ignore or discount evidence to the contrary.

Example: “I know I succeed a lot at work, but I still feel like a failure.”

• Labeling: assigning unconditional, global characteristics to oneself or others without considering that the evidence may be more likely to lead to less negative conclusions.

Example: “I’m a loser,” “He’s a bore.”

• Magnification/minimization: evaluating oneself, others, or a situation by exaggerating the negative and/or minimizing the positive.

Example: “An average grade means that I am incapable. An “excellent” grade does not mean that I am smart.”

• Mental filter (selective abstraction): groundless consideration of only failures, defeats, deprivations instead of the full picture of all events.

Example: “One bad test result indicates that I am a lazy person who could not prepare properly,”

• “Mind reading”: a person’s belief that he knows the thoughts of others, and a refusal to consider other, more likely possibilities.

Example: “He thinks I don’t know anything about this job.”

• Overgeneralization: formulating generalized negative conclusions that go far beyond the current situation.

Example: “Because I felt out of place in the meeting, I am not good at meeting people.”

• Personalization: Seeing oneself as the cause of other people's negative behavior without considering more likely explanations for their behavior. A person’s confidence that his mistakes and miscalculations are the center of attention of others.

Example: “The repairman was rude to me because I did something wrong.”

• Should ("I should" thinking): Having a clear, immutable idea about how other people should behave or how one's own behavior should be. If expectations are not met, a person perceives it as a failure. Example: “It’s terrible that I was mistaken. I must succeed in everything."
• Tunnel thinking: focusing on the negative aspects of a situation.

Example: “My son’s teacher can’t do anything right. He constantly criticizes, does not feel for the children, and in general he has not succeeded as a teacher.”

And now an example, a case from practice.

Example: Love Triangle

A married man started courting a divorced woman. The woman herself would not have paid attention to him; as they say, he is not her type. But by his attitude towards her, his expression of interest in her feelings and inner world, his words about his love for her and that he could not live without her, he achieved closeness from her. However, apart from sex, he showed almost no love for her. The woman expected moral and material help from him. I expected him to divorce his wife and marry her. Time passed, she waited, hoped, but none of her expectations came true, and after one event, she decided that she was wasting her time and that she was left “with nothing.”

The woman experiences the following feelings about this:

C1=anger at man;

C2=offense towards a man;

C3=anger at self;

C4=depressed;

C5=guilt towards his wife.

It takes more time and effort to free yourself from several negative emotions than from just one. Therefore, it makes sense to determine the intensity of the manifestation of emotion, i.e. how strong she is. To do this, you can use a ten-point scale. The strongest negative emotion that a person has experienced in his life is taken as ten points.

In the given example of a love triangle, assessing the intensity of emotions gave the following results:

Table for identifying emotions and their intensity

Definition of Event A

The key question to determine A is: “What exactly caused C?”

Event Definition Table

Automatic Thoughts Chart

To develop the skill of detecting maladaptive automatic thoughts, it is recommended to keep a “Journal of Observations of Reactions and Automatic Thoughts,” the form of which is given below.

At the beginning of training, it is recommended to fill out only the first four columns.

In the continuation of this article, we will examine the question of what to do with automatic thoughts that lead to dysfunctional feelings, unpleasant bodily symptoms and unconstructive behavior.

Literature

1. A. Ellis, K. McLaren “Rational-emotive behavioral therapy.” - Phoenix, 2008. - 157 p.

Adapted with permission from A. Beck, MD

Sometimes the question of assessing the intensity of one's most negative emotion leaves people confused. Then you can ask them to simply imagine that the strongest negative emotion that they can imagine, but which they have never experienced, is ten points.

Frustration is a state that occurs in a person when his positive expectations are not met.

The worst thing about anxious thoughts is that even when you realize you're acting irrationally, it doesn't always help. In most cases, this only increases anxiety when the thought comes: “If I know this is irrational, why can’t I stop? Oh god, I can't stop it." And you begin to believe that you are no longer in control of your mind.

Amy Desu

Cycle of Thoughts

Life throws us different situations. For example, you are walking in the forest and see a bear. The thought automatically arises: “There’s a bear there!” It triggers a physiological response: blood pressure rises, pulse and heart rate increase. Several emotions appear almost simultaneously. Seeing a bear makes you feel anxious, panicked, and afraid.

Then the defense mechanism starts - you run away from the bear. Although they say that it is best not to run away, for the sake of the example we will ignore this fact. And now you are safe. What's the next thought? “Ugh, I'm safe! I survived!". And your body's response is that your heart rate slows, your pulse rate drops, and you begin to breathe more naturally. Other emotions are included - joy, relief, satisfaction. What will your behavior be? Remembering the miraculous rescue, upon returning home you will open a bottle of wine or enjoy ice cream. To celebrate.

But let’s say that in the cave you are overcome by completely different thoughts: “I’m such a weakling! Why did I run away? It was just a bear cub. Why am I always such a coward? You are upset, your breathing remains fast and ragged. Emotions range between disappointment, anger and self-loathing. What about behavior? You can also buy yourself a kilo of ice cream, but that will be your punishment for yourself.

The above scenario is Aaron Beck's cognitive behavioral theory in a nutshell. Its essence is that thoughts, beliefs, feelings, body, behavior and our past are connected: they influence each other. Through the practice of managing our thoughts, we can change the physiological or mental side of our reactions. For example, avoid stress, depression or anxiety, create enthusiasm and great motivation to do something.

It's difficult, but with dedication and practice you can achieve impressive results.

Benefits of Mastering Your Thoughts

You will sleep better

The ability to control your thoughts directly depends on the quality of your sleep and how long it takes to fall asleep. Are you tired of tossing and turning in bed for several hours?

You will achieve inner peace

Anyone who experiences panic attacks or is subject to obsessive thoughts will be simply happy if it all ends. And the first thing you should start with is control of thoughts.

You will increase your emotional intelligence

We have already found out that managing thoughts directly affects emotions. If so, you will increase your emotional intelligence, begin to understand your feelings, and experience less stress.

You will improve your memory and concentration

Once we learn to direct our thoughts in the right direction, we will begin to concentrate several times better. This means your memory will improve. Add to this the fact that the development of creative thinking depends on its quality and you get a whole range of advantages.

How to learn to manage your thoughts

What can you do to remove obsessive thoughts and learn to replace them with proactive, necessary, positive ones?

Ten Day Challenge

This method is based on changing your vocabulary. Without language, we find ourselves in a state of emotional chaos. We have the ability to communicate, and the way we do this can improve the neural functioning of the brain and relieve stress. If we are careless with the words we say in our heads and out loud, we lose our ability to solve problems, calm our minds, and communicate with people.

Here are four steps you need to take to change your vocabulary. 10 days are enough for this, but everything is individual.

Step One: Become aware of the habitual words you use to describe negative or anxious emotions.

Start noticing the labels you attach to situations, emotions and feelings. If you say something like, “I'm so worried about this,” stop yourself and recognize that “worry” may be too strong a word. It might be worth saying that you're "a little worried." Watch your language and do not exaggerate the intensity of emotions.

Or better yet: consciously choose a word that will reduce the negative connotation of the situation. Instead of saying you're "angry" at someone, describe yourself as a little "annoyed" or "disappointed with their reaction."

If someone asks you, “How are you?” Instead of saying “Okay,” you can simply smile and break the pattern. You can add: “You have no idea how I feel!” We often miss great opportunities to lift our spirits when we use familiar words.

Step two: Write down three words that you regularly use that reinforce your negative feelings or emotions.

You might use words like “I'm upset,” “I'm depressed,” or “I'm humiliated.” Come up with alternative words that reduce the intensity of these negative emotions.

Maybe instead of “I'm humiliated” you should say “I'm a little embarrassed” about how the meeting went?

To soften emotional tension, you can use so-called modifiers: “I’m just a little puzzled,” “I don’t like this a little.” Remember that we lose our temper when we use categorical words.

Step Three: Write down three words you use to describe your positive experience.

People often ask you: “How are you?” Why not finally come up with three original yet truthful answers that enhance positive feelings and inspire you? Say “amazing,” “incredible,” “impressive.” These may not be the words you feel are your own. Then find yours so that when you use them, you feel whole.

Step Four: Pull the Right Levers.

Choose two people from your life: a close friend and someone else you respect and are afraid of disappointing. Tell them about your commitment to replacing keywords in your vocabulary. Explain that if they hear you use an old word, they should ask, “Do you really feel that way or are you just using old expressions?”

If you say, “I'm depressed,” have a loved one ask, “Are you really depressed or just a little out of sorts?” All this will provide additional support and help form a new habit.

By carefully and consciously choosing the words you use to describe your experiences, you can become more sensitive to how you really feel and how strong those emotions are.

Programming

Each of us, at any point in our lives, believes that we deserve more. But when reality diverges from this belief, we experience disappointment and dissatisfaction. They either push us forward towards change, or they slow us down and drive us into a shell. Which option do you choose?

If the second, then you need to “reprogram” yourself. Here are three steps to do this.

Decide

What is your desired outcome? The first step is to get absolutely clear about what you want. Clarity is strength. The more accurately you envision the end result, the stronger your vision will be, and the greater the chance of turning that vision into reality.

If you argue with a friend, you risk getting involved in a conflict and ruining the mood for yourself and him. But what if you stopped in the middle of an argument and asked yourself what the desired outcome was? It’s not about arguing and swearing, but about finding a solution? Now the focus is completely on this.

Give direction to your thoughts. What do you want physically, financially, emotionally, spiritually, in your business, work, personal life? Decide that you will not act unconsciously.

Take Action

Now it's time to rid your mind of fear and uncertainty. How can I do that? By turning down other opportunities that do not lead to a decision.

Fear is one of the biggest traps that keeps people from taking action. Fear of rejection, failure, success, pain, the unknown - we all have fears. And the only way to deal with them is to confront them. You have to look them in the eye and make the effort no matter what.

Are you afraid of failure? Failure is an education. Look at it this way: if you fail, you will learn what doesn't work. And when you try again, you can use it to your advantage. People often don't take real action to achieve their goals. They just keep saying, "Someday I'll do it."

The ability to interrupt negative thoughts is like a muscle. At first, when you try to load it, it will be difficult and even painful. But if you start small and try to change your way of thinking every day, you will gradually become stronger. Soon everything will work out effortlessly.

Take action and overcome the negativity. Take action to make your life better. When you take action and end up with a small victory, you move on to the next level. When you do something you couldn’t expect from yourself before, it fills you with strength.

Reprogram the brain

Once you have clearly decided what you are going to do and have taken action, you need to take inventory of your life. Pay attention to what you are getting from your current activities and evaluate what is working and what is not. And then change. Find solutions that will help.

The most important part of finding a solution is flexibility. Flexibility is strength. If you're harsh in your judgment and life feels like a tunnel, you're missing out on unexpected opportunities and alternative routes that can provide incredible benefits. Remember that you are never in control of 100% of your life and all situations.

Think about it: Is your life going according to plan? Probably not. The path is never straight. And so it is important to remain flexible - to learn from mistakes, cope with failures and use negative experiences as a driving force for change. The point is to understand one thing: keep moving forward and use mistakes and failures in order to achieve success.

Fight negative thoughts

When it comes to managing thoughts, we mean getting rid of negative ones. Everything else seems to work itself out.

Because we are constantly exposed to negative information from the media and other people, our brains are always on alert to focus on possible threats to our safety and well-being. These negative stimuli release neurochemicals in the body that cause anxiety and depression.

How to get rid of negative thoughts:

1. Write them down. When automatic negative thoughts start running through your mind, write them down so you can clearly identify and name them.
2. Explore them. Ask yourself: are these thoughts true?
3. Answer them. If negative thoughts are false, address them. This dialogue brings you out of your state of unconsciousness and allows you to look your enemy in the face. It is best to keep it on paper.

All methods of disrupting negative thoughts have one thing in common - they encourage you to take an active role in challenging your thoughts rather than being in passive acceptance (which is life-destroying). In a word, without consciously working on your thoughts - sitting down, writing them down and answering - it is impossible to get rid of the negative.

Travis Robertson Strategy

Thoughts are everything. Many people are not aware of what they are thinking most of the time. This is where all the problems come from.

At the same time, you know the impact thoughts can have on you. You may become depressed, angry, frustrated, lonely, anxious, sad and doubtful.

Thoughts control how we feel at any given moment. Therefore, by controlling our thoughts, we change our feelings.

Robertson offers five steps to mastering your thoughts.

Learn to stop your thoughts

One of the first things you need to do is learn to stop in the middle of your thoughts (good, bad or just plain boring). At different times of the day, catch yourself thinking. How are you feeling? What are you thinking about? Why are you thinking about this?

When we are angry, our intelligence level drops significantly. You also forget that you need to observe your thoughts. So watch them when you are in your normal mood.

Don't put pressure on yourself. Take 5 minutes and try to understand what are the main thoughts in your head right now.

Identify Negative Emotions

Every feeling we have is a direct result of what we were thinking. So if you feel anxious, ask yourself, “Why am I anxious?” Always look for the root of the problem.

Record a mental movie

By default, most people “make” negative psychological films. When a current situation reminds us of a previous one, we tend to replay the movie.

What you need to do is determine what kind of movie it is and “write” it down. For what? Because you need to pull it out of the subconscious. Now you can analyze the film with a cool head.

Find the lie

Watch the film carefully. How to spot a lie? As a rule, these are some specific labels, like “stupid”, “loser” and “not deserving of success”. You know that none of this is true. Write down each point of the lie on paper.

Recognize the Truth

The only way to fight lies is the truth, and now is the time to understand what the truth is for you. Next to each false point, write down about ten refutations. If you are stupid, then why did you act like a smart person in these ten cases? This simple exercise will remove the negative soil from under your feet.

Books

There are many books on the topic of thought management, so you will not have a shortage of literature. In some, the bias goes towards esotericism, in others - science, while others simply contain good advice from the personal experience of the authors. We advise you to start with the first book on our list, and then decide for yourself which book to read next.

• "How a Man Thinks or the Thinking of a Man" James Allen
• “The Power of Now or the Power of Now” Eckhart Tolle
• “The subconscious can do anything” John Kehoe
• "The Silva Method. Mind Control by Jose Silva and Philip Miele
• “Dreaming is not harmful. How to Get What You Really Want by Barbara Sher and Annie Gottlieb
• "Think and Grow Rich" Napoleon Hill
• “Change your thinking and you will change your life” Brian Tracy
• "Creative Visualization" by Shakti Gawain
• "Thoughts Matter" David Hamilton
• "Awaken the Giant Within" Tony Robbins

Each person comes at one time to realize the power of thoughts. This can happen at 20 or 60, but the sooner the better. We hope this article has convinced you that mastering your thoughts is the most important step towards peace of mind and achieving your goals.

We wish you good luck!

The power of memory

Remembering good things builds your confidence, just as negative experiences build resistance to life. If I really want something to happen, I remember happy events from the past. When I decided to write this book and was wondering how much time it would take me, I remembered all the cases when I met the work on time. I also remembered the satisfaction with which I worked before, how wonderfully everything worked out for me. I retrieved from my memory all the positive reviews of my work and gratitude. All this strengthened my belief that I could do something like this again. And I did!

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