Child wakes up at night with hysterics Komarovsky 4 years

Many parents encounter tantrums in children aged one to three or four years. The first tantrums can begin after one and a half years and reach a peak at 2.5 - 3 years, when the famous “three-year crisis” occurs. Older children already have a good vocabulary, can identify their feelings and express them in an acceptable way, and tantrums fade away.

The reasons for hysterics in a child, as a rule, come down to the fact that his own interests and desires do not coincide with the demands of adults. “Classic” situations that can lead to hysteria:

the child does not get what he wants;
he was torn away from an exciting activity;
he was overtired;
wants parents' attention;
plays games that he cannot win due to age or developmental disabilities;
He just can’t put his desires and experiences into words.

When a child is 2 years old, constant tantrums are not considered evidence of any developmental abnormalities; on the contrary, this is a so-called “mini-teenage” crisis that must be overcome so that in adolescence one does not have to work out the stages of growing up with much greater problems.

The child shows negativism in relation to the demands of the adult, is stubborn, trying to defend his opinion and force his parents to take his wishes into account, becomes obstinate, goes against the accepted rules of behavior in the family. It is not surprising that with all these signs of a new stage of growing up, the child has frequent tantrums. If you have a child, at 2.5 years old tantrums can happen in the house 2-3 times a week or more often.

Possible causes of nighttime tantrums

If we talk about sleep disorders in children, then it would be logical to consider this problem starting from the age of one year and older. Since during the first 10-12 months of life you are unlikely to find a baby who can rest all night without waking up, because he needs to eat and feel his mother nearby. Although in this matter everything is very individual.

The main thing for parents of young children is to realize that they are not alone in their nightly vigils. There will still be many sleepless nights until your baby gets used to uninterrupted sleep. Statistics say that almost 20% of children aged 2 years wake up crying in the middle of the night.

Responsiveness syndrome

Bedtime is synonymous with hell for many parents. Requests and negotiations seem endless: tell a story or read a book, bring a small glass of water, forgot to pee, one more kiss, and so on. Parents are running out of patience, and irritation leads to the baby starting to cry and, even though the child is already 2 years old, waking up at night with hysterics. This is a tactic that children use to teach their parents to follow their lead.

What is considered hysterical?

Many mothers have at least once gotten up because of the crying of their 2-3 year old child, who had previously slept peacefully, waking up only when he wanted to go to the toilet or have a snack. It is quite easy to distinguish hysterics from ordinary night wakings. This is a strong nervous excitement, often uncontrollable, manifested in screaming and tears. Trembling and uncontrolled movements of the arms and legs are possible. An anxious child may not recognize his parents, pushing them away and even hitting them.

Night tantrums are often confused with whims, which manifest themselves just like a child’s daytime whims. The baby begins to cry because he needs his mother's attention. As soon as the mother is nearby or he gets what he wanted, the child calms down and falls asleep on his own.

If the parents fail to calm down, on the contrary, when touched, the baby screams louder, breaks out, breathing becomes intermittent, the forehead becomes covered with sweat, we are talking about hysteria. They can be isolated, repeated over a long period of time, or not repeated at all. But more worrying is the occurrence of similar situations almost every night. Here it is worth thinking about taking action as soon as possible.

Doctors do not advise immediately classifying this condition as a pathology. As a rule, there are no mental or neurological abnormalities here. In most cases, time passes and children outgrow this period. This does not mean that you should wait for the moment without doing anything. It is necessary to understand the reasons.

How should parents react?

Your first ally is a clear bedtime routine. Good sleep habits are learned and are not innate in babies. By establishing this routine, you will clearly mark the transition between day and night. The sooner you do this, the faster the child will adapt. Such a ritual will promote relaxation and the development of a reflex, which is caused by the repetition of the same gestures and actions that promote sleep.

In the evening, any activity that excites the child should be avoided. Reading or discussing something are good choices. Harsh demands for your child to go to sleep, irritated negotiations and tears will not end the day on a positive note. Only soft words of love spoken before putting the baby to bed can soothe and promote sweet dreams.

Talk to your child about your sleep expectations. Children, regardless of age, understand more than we think. To make your bedtime routine an enjoyable time for everyone, consider the following:

It is important to take your time, but the ritual should have a beginning and an end. It takes 15 to 20 minutes for the child, knowing about the zeal of the parents, to fall asleep after some resistance.
A regular schedule is important - feeding times, playtime, bathing. Sleep must also fit into this schedule so that the child can anticipate the outcome and respond positively to it.

What will the doctor say?

Let's listen to the opinion of the famous pediatrician Evgeniy Komarovsky regarding why a child wakes up at night with hysterics:

During the period of bone tissue growth, the amount of calcium in the child’s body decreases, which is directly related to the quality of sleep. Sleep becomes shallow and the child wakes up frequently.
Disorders of calcium metabolism can also cause excessive milk consumption.
As for hysterics, this question is difficult to answer unambiguously. Here you need, first of all, to understand how serious the reason for such hysteria is. If there is a health problem, its symptoms will not take long to appear. Or maybe the child simply had mucus accumulated and was unable to cough up.
Another situation. The child wants to eat at night. What should mom do: sleep or cook? Most likely, the mother will follow her child’s lead. But you need to forget about your feminine essence and realize that there is time for food and sleep. Decide whether you will indulge the demands every time or listen to common sense.

Many parents have encountered this phenomenon, especially if the baby is not yet a year old. On the other hand, confusion and misunderstanding arise, because the cause of this problem is unknown.

Possible causes of children's tantrums

What to do to avoid nightmares, how to help your child and is it dangerous? The first step is to look for the cause of this condition, and then develop an action plan. The most basic reason for hysterics is an unstable emotional situation in the family. When a child witnesses conflicts, quarrels or fights, this negatively affects his nervous system. The mother's agitated behavior also has a bad effect on the child's psyche. Especially if she is constantly tired, depressed, and often in a state of anger. The child immediately feels if his mother is irritated, so the tension is immediately transferred to him.

Factors affecting sleep

The main reason why children's sleep is disturbed is nightmares. They bother kids for various reasons, but the main ones are a stressful day, the emotional situation in the family, and uncomfortable sleeping conditions.
Also, night restlessness is provoked by insufficient activity during the day.
Other common reasons leading to hysteria are: change of place of residence, long travel, incorrect daily routine, as well as its change. If there is no regime, it must be created taking into account the psychological and physiological characteristics of the child. It is especially important for a baby in his first year, when sleeping and eating are the main everyday activities. The mode makes it possible to feel the stability of the world around you. The body will get used to falling asleep and waking up at a certain time, and the child’s psyche will not be overloaded. On the other hand, if there is no routine, and the baby is allowed to eat and sleep when he wants, this can cause nightly tantrums.
The reason that a child wakes up and screams at night can be any new stage in his life. If you don’t talk to the baby enough and don’t spend enough time, he will start demanding this at night. There are often cases when a child has matured, but the parents did not take this into account; their behavior does not change, which leads to instability of the nervous system.
If you don't overheat your baby, his sleep will definitely improve. No matter how trivial it may sound, comfort during sleep plays an important role for healthy sleep. A too warm blanket leads to hysteria if you cover it at night, fearing the coolness even in the summer. If the child is one year old, it is more difficult to recognize this reason, but if he opens up, you should not try to cover him up again.
There are times when night tantrums begin due to changes in the daily routine. For example, if the mother used to read a book to the baby, but then for certain reasons this became impossible, the psyche may react negatively. Even minor changes in routine can cause a child to wake up crying at night.

If your older child has a lot of activities during the day, the mental load may become too high for him. In this case, parents often observe how he wakes up at night in tears. The most common causes of nightmares in children include watching scary cartoons before going to bed.

It is not recommended to excite the nervous system of a little person anyway, and in the evening this is especially harmful and leads to sleep disturbances. If you stop watching cartoons immediately before going to bed, the risk of waking up at night will be reduced. Children one year and younger should not be allowed to stay in front of the TV for a long time, and scary cartoons should not be shown.

Parents' behavior when their child is hysterical at night

At the first screams coming from the nursery, you should get up and go there. It is important to understand that an episode of nighttime arousal is often not recognized by the child. It may be part of a dream.
Without losing your calm, approach your baby and hug him. Stay with him until he calms down. In this case, you need to hold him firmly, but not rudely, and calmly wait until the hysteria subsides.
When you extinguish night tantrums in a 2-year-old child, special physical strength is not required. With older children this is more difficult, because during uncontrollable excitement they can wave their arms and legs so much that they involuntarily hit you. For this purpose, you can use a blanket or blanket. Wrap your screamer up like a baby and hold him until he stops kicking, then rock him gently. Take your baby to the toilet and send him back to bed.
Don't make these nightly episodes something pleasant. Do not allow the rest of the night to be spent in your parents' bed. Strictly limit persuasion and conversations in general. When you start talking to your baby, you can focus your child on the attention you are giving him at such an inopportune moment. Children easily reinforce deviant behavior for the sake of the favor they receive.

In order to reduce episodes of agitation to zero, it is better to prevent them rather than extinguish them.

These tips will help not only when the baby screams at night, but also when the child is hysterical before bed:

Follow your baby's daily routine. Tell your baby about his plans for the day. If a child knows the schedule of his affairs and classes, this reduces his nervous tension;
Introduce strict restrictions on watching TV and electronic gadgets. It is better if they are not used at all two hours before bedtime;
Instead of watching TV in the evening, read interesting books, listen to music, play calm games;
Night tantrums in a child 3 years of age and older are significantly reduced if there is no stress in his life. This condition is provoked by poor nutrition, lack of sleep, negative emotions, and a feeling of loss of control over life;
Vivid impressions and a large amount of entertainment during the day reliably increase the occurrence of hysterics;
Provide your child with feasible physical activity. Non-competitive sports will be useful - swimming, gymnastics, yoga;
During the day, give your child enough attention, talk and play with him;
Don't demand too much from your baby. Modern children have a very stressful lifestyle, and stress is a companion to this lifestyle.

If the efforts of the parents do not help, and the child wakes up at night and screams in hysterics several times a night, without calming down for more than 40 minutes, then this problem goes beyond the “home” category and the child should be shown to the pediatrician.

sedatives;
massage;
physiotherapy;
examination of the nervous system.

Being a parent is not an easy job. There are many problems along the way that you need to solve on your own. Having corrected the situation when a child wakes up at night with hysterics, mothers and fathers become more experienced. They are relieved to realize that they can handle this and other problems of raising children.

Children's hysteria in a dream. A child has a tantrum at night. Sleep strategy for children over one year old

Source: www.rastut-goda.ru

Night hysteria in a one-year-old baby

If a child has already passed a year, he spends a lot of energy exploring the surrounding space, objects and people. By exploring everything that is nearby, his brain and nervous system are actively developing. He is trying to walk and talk, which means that mental development is at the peak of its formation. This can lead to the baby sleeping restlessly, waking up at night and screaming shrilly.

If the baby is not yet one year old, colic is usually the reason he wakes up and sleeps restlessly. At this age, the intestines are not yet sufficiently capable of digesting complementary foods, and sometimes colic begins even from mother’s milk. Particularly often, gases accumulate in the intestines at night, causing cramps and pain. At one year old, the child reacts to this with intense crying and hysterics, which cannot always be quickly calmed down. Sometimes this takes minutes, but most often an hour or more. In some cases, painful sensations wake up several times a night, exhausting both mother and child. The most difficult thing during this period is to understand your child, because in a year it is very difficult to guess what exactly may be bothering you.

Why do babies become hysterical after and during sleep?

A baby's perception of the day is very different from how an older toddler evaluates the world. The baby cannot connect the images that he saw during the day. The baby sees scattered pictures in his sleep. And it is these images that frighten him at night. Sometimes he is scared, and in this way he tries to find protection from his parents. Often the baby did not rest enough during the day: the routine was disrupted. Or maybe he was overstimulated before bed due to bright lights, loud music or games.

Children under six months

By 4 months, the baby has become stronger physically and emotionally. He stays awake a lot during the day and receives an abundance of new information. And it remains in his memory in the form of unrelated impressions. Nightmares do not occur during this period. But even at 5 months the baby still does not have nightmares, since his memory stores broken images. Only at 6 months does the baby begin to connect daily impressions into single pictures. But during this period there are no psychological reasons for hysteria.

A nervous condition occurs due to:

overload of the nervous system;
stress received before bedtime;
discomfort and lack of protection and support;
onset or state of the disease.

This nocturnal condition is quite easily treated.

Children from 7 months to 2 years

If a 7-month-old baby does not want to fall asleep, screams and cries when going to bed, or wakes up hysterically 1.5-2 hours after falling asleep, it means that he has a negative impression of the process of getting ready for bed.

In this case, you need to calmly and firmly insist on following the established rules:

remove toys before bedtime;
make the bed with mom;
take a bath;
drink herbal tea.

By repeating the ritual every day, the baby will get used to tuning into a restful sleep, and nighttime tantrums will no longer bother him. At 9 months, emotional communication with the mother is important for the baby. A quiet lullaby and reading poems that the baby loves will help to avoid hysteria. It’s useful to just be near your baby’s crib before he falls asleep: this way the baby will feel protected

At 10 months, to prevent nightmares, it is useful to allow the baby to actively move during the day. But in no case should you forget about daytime sleep. If the baby does not rest, then night hysterics will inevitably occur. At one and a half years old, the baby can already fall asleep on her own. And the formed habits of going to bed at night are already established.

If night hysterics continue, and the child is healthy, then the causes of the condition are: family conflicts, socialization of the baby.

Tantrums in a two year old child

At 2 years old, a child is able not only to divide images into positive and negative, but also shows his own attitude towards them. Why does the baby throw a tantrum at night, sob and can’t calm down? And he simply empathizes with the hero of the fairy tale he listened to before going to bed. The hysteria began to have psychological roots.

Hysterical behavior in children aged three to six years

In children aged 3-6 years, hysterical behavior has its own characteristics. This is due to the development of the nervous system.

Sleepwalking

The cause of the condition is heredity. If one of the child’s relatives suffered from sleepwalking, then there is a risk of recurrence of the condition in the baby. Sleepwalking occurs in children over 6 years of age. By age 16, it usually goes away on its own. Sleepwalking begins 2-3 hours after going to bed. The baby can walk, dress, eat. But he is not aware of his actions. If you wake him up, he may fall. Sleepwalking is not a disease. Its causes are not related to emotional stress, fear, or fantasies. It doesn't need correction.

You just need to protect your sleepwalking baby:

close the door with the high latch;
provide windows with child protection;
remove sharp objects and toys.

The condition lasts for 30 minutes. After waking up, the baby does not remember his travels around the apartment.

Alternation of sleep phases

The REM sleep phase is shallow. At this time, the brain works on images stored in memory during the day. The nervous system also works. The baby's eyes move under the eyelids, and the arms and legs may tremble. Sometimes the baby pronounces words or sounds.

In children 3-6 years old, the duration of the REM sleep phase has already decreased. Switching is faster. But it is precisely at this time that the baby is frightened by nightmares: hysterics arise.

Nightmare

The little one has already grown up enough to begin to fantasize about unpleasant images received during the day. He invents various fears for himself, and it’s up to the nervous system to turn the fear into a nightmare.

How to help a child?

In order to have a restful sleep at night and without nightmares, it is very important to stabilize the situation in the family and improve relationships with all its members. Negativity towards each other that a child hears from parents can develop into a significant problem. Establishing relationships requires some internal work on yourself and, of course, a lot of time, but this is very important.

What exactly should you do:

You cannot sort things out if the child is in the same room with his parents. During a quarrel, there is an open confrontation between spouses, and adults say things that the child should not hear. What the child’s psyche perceives during a quarrel is interpreted by him completely differently than by an adult. At one year old, a baby can be greatly frightened by the loud voices of his parents, which will subsequently affect the quality of his sleep.
It is important to increase the time of the bedtime ritual, that is, pay attention to the child longer than earlier before falling asleep (reading, talking, hugging). This will be especially useful if unpleasant events happened during the day, or if there was an argument that he witnessed.
The baby will not be acutely worried about the disagreements between the parents if you tell him a fairy tale before going to bed. In the place of the heroes, you need to imagine mom and dad who love him regardless of all the circumstances.
To prevent problems from leaving a mark on the fragile psyche of a small child, you should contact a family psychologist.

Parental attention to the needs of the baby is the most necessary qualities to avoid difficult situations. Patience, care and at the same time firmness in your intentions will free you not only from nightly worries, but also from disagreements in the family. Then the child will feel loved and protected.

Today we will talk about the worst nightmare of any parent - when a child wakes up at night with a hysteria, and there is no way to calm him down. To many, this situation does not seem supernatural - it happens that babies wake up at night crying, but then continue to sleep peacefully.

Most advice from doctors and other parents about how to calm a child is tailored to this situation. They provide for the establishment and strict adherence to a daily routine and evening procedures before bedtime, long walks in the fresh air, massage, and relaxing baths. All these recommendations really work, but not in the case when the baby wakes up at night and cries, starts screaming, doesn’t react to anything and doesn’t know what he wants. Unfortunately, some people encounter this situation quite often - sometimes even every night. What are these - children's night terrors? What is the reason for their appearance and how to deal with them?

Crying in a child's sleep may mean that the baby is having a nightmare.

Contacting specialists

If a child constantly falls asleep with hysterics, his behavior becomes more and more aggressive during the day, he causes damage to himself and others - this may be evidence of a neurological disease. It is imperative to contact a specialist (primarily a neurologist) if the child loses consciousness during a hysteria, the hysteria ends with vomiting, sudden lethargy, and also if the hysterics continue after the age of four.

When a child reaches the age of 3 years, many parents are faced with a problem that they did not know about before - frequent. Ignorance and misunderstanding of the reasons for the hysterical behavior of children, as well as the impasse on how to behave in such moments and stop the child’s frightening behavior, become the cause of panic for many mothers and fathers. Advice from a psychologist will help you understand the reason for this behavior in 3-year-old children, how to deal with hysterics and prevent them in the future.

In raising such a child, parents need to be patient, constantly praise him, hug and caress him, communicate as equals, listen and involve him in household chores.

Strong

The processes of excitation and inhibition in the brain in such children are balanced. A child with a strong type of nervous system is almost always cheerful and cheerful, easily communicates with others, and for the appearance of hysterical behavior he needs a good reason.

Conflict situations with parents and peers arise extremely rarely for such children; they sleep and eat well, willingly participate in various clubs, but often change hobbies, because having figured out something, they immediately lose interest in the old hobby. Negative aspects in the character of such children are inconstancy, frequent breaking of their promises, and difficulties in maintaining a daily routine.

Unbalanced

The processes of excitation of the nervous system of such a child in the brain prevail over the processes of inhibition, so he is hot-tempered, easily excitable and emotionally unstable. A child can be put into a state of excitement by a new toy or a bright event. Therefore, such children sleep poorly and not soundly, often wake up and cry at night.

In a circle of peers, an unbalanced child tries to take leadership and be the center of attention and events. Such kids do not know how to finish what they start. When engaged in any business, they cannot stand even the slightest criticism, they can flare up, drop everything and leave, while getting angry and showing aggression. Parents of such children can be advised to be more flexible and patient, to teach their child to complete all tasks, to be restrained and obligatory.

Slow

This type of nervous system is characterized by delayed excitation and a predominance of the inhibition process. Children with a slow type of nervous system eat and sleep well from birth, they are calm, they can be alone for a long time and not suffer from this, finding their own entertainment.

Parents of such children are often surprised by their restraint, prudence and predictability. The child is slow, brings any task he starts to completion and does not like sudden changes in the situation. He is restrained in his emotions, so it is often difficult for parents to understand his mood. Advice is to encourage the child to take active actions that develop motor and speech activity.

Children with weak and unbalanced types of nervous system are most prone to tantrums at the age of 3 years. To exclude pathologies and congenital diseases of the nervous system, parents are advised to show the baby to a pediatric neurologist.

Source of Nightmares

There are no children who are not afraid of anything at all. At the same time, fears that persist over a long period of time should attract the attention of parents. Their appearance is always due to certain factors and rarely happens out of nowhere. Among the most common are:

heredity;
severe pregnancy in the mother;
pathological situations during childbirth;
presence of serious diseases;
previous operations (especially under anesthesia);
lack of communication with mother;
various psychological traumas;
an abundance of impressions and overload of the nervous system;
tense atmosphere in the family - quarrels between parents, physical aggression on their part, stress and conflicts.

The reasons for the emergence of fears usually come from:

the child’s daily life – change of place of residence, school, kindergarten, changes in the environment, conflict situations;
situations within the family - the appearance of a new family member, including the birth of a younger brother or sister, death of relatives, divorce of parents;
media - television, radio and the Internet contain a lot of negative information: stories and programs about crimes, disasters and terrorist attacks, journalistic investigations, documentaries.

Children quickly absorb any information, especially negative information. Therefore, watching non-children's films can affect a child's sleep

Solutions to the problem

reduce the intellectual load on the baby: irritation and fatigue in many modern preschoolers are caused by an excessive flow of information;

adjust the daily routine: you should not allow the baby to play until midnight - if the child falls asleep early and wakes up early, he will develop a correct understanding of the routine;
make sure that the baby stops playing active games 1.5 hours before bedtime;
review the baby’s menu: a preschooler’s dinner should not contain a lot of fat;
do not allow your child to spend more than 2 hours in front of the TV;
seek the help of aromatherapy.

We suggest you read: When to introduce peas to a child

If the baby's tantrums are repeated several times, you should spend 3-4 nights in the child's room. Feeling protected, the baby will forget about nightmares. To calm your preschooler, you will need to remember the events of recent weeks and analyze the behavior of all household members. Scary dreams rarely appear out of nowhere. Pediatricians remind: the environment in the home should be as comfortable and friendly as possible.

If you can guess what is upsetting your child, talk to your child frankly. Do not interrupt your son or daughter when, in response to your questions, you hear a stream of complaints (about the teacher, about the “harmful” children from the neighbor’s yard). A confidential conversation with a parent will eliminate some of the tension that torments the child. If possible, try to ensure that the preschooler does not communicate with people who make him feel anxious and disliked.

Confidential communication with a child is the key to solving the problem

How to identify fears?

Night fears in children usually appear before the age of one year, starting at 6 months, and are associated with the developmental characteristics of the baby. At 2–3 years old, children are afraid to be left alone; at 4–6 years old, they are frightened by the darkness and various monsters and monstrosities, which is reflected in their dreams. Characteristic features of nightmares are:

they usually begin 2 - 2.5 hours after falling asleep, usually between 1 and 3 hours;
duration - from 5 to 20 minutes, with a sudden start and end of hysteria;
repeating several times during the night;
the child wakes up abruptly, screams and cries, opens his eyes, but he does not notice anything around and does not react to anything;
during an attack, increased sweating and difficulty breathing are observed;
the child wakes up in hysterics, but does not react in any way to the appearance of his parents, since he is not aware of their presence or himself;
it is not possible to calm the baby’s hysterics or switch his attention to something else;
unconscious aggression towards parents and attempts to destroy the room in which they are located.

If you discover the above points in the behavior of your own baby, do not despair. It’s hard for any parent to watch their own child’s nightmares and tantrums and not be able to help him, but it is possible to correct the situation. You can seek help from a psychologist or wait until the baby grows up and the nightmares go away on their own.

Children's imagination is quite vivid. Therefore, the child can come up with many monsters hiding in his room. Parents need to dispel the child’s fears by showing that under the bed and in the closet there is absolutely nothing.

Contacting specialists

the child does not get what he wants;
he was torn away from an exciting activity;
he was overtired;
wants parents' attention;
plays games that he cannot win due to age or developmental disabilities;
He just can’t put his desires and experiences into words.

How to deal with night terrors?

Hysterics and nightmares at night go away on their own with age, but following some simple recommendations can make them easier. You should:

stay calm - such problems are quite common in children aged 3 - 5 years and are not as terrible as they seem to you;
constantly be close to the baby - your task is not to allow him in this state to harm himself and others;
do not remind the child about what happened, so as not to intensify his feelings;
try to prevent the occurrence of nightmares by waking up your baby about 30 minutes after falling asleep - this way you will avoid another attack;
give the child the opportunity to get enough sleep by increasing the time allotted for sleep and organizing daytime rest, which is especially important for children under 3 years of age;
do not let your baby get overtired - monitor his loads during the day; for children 7–10 years old, if they refuse to sleep at night, change the time they wake up or go to bed;
show your child that you care - a close, trusting relationship will help you calmly discuss the situation and try to find the source of its occurrence.

A child wakes up at night with hysterics: reasons, how to help

For children of any age, sleep is very important. This is not just a rest after activity; at this time, the information that the baby receives during the day is absorbed, and his mental development improves. Therefore, sleep must be sound and healthy, so that he enters the new day cheerful, ready for new impressions. Not all children are able to sleep through the night. It is considered normal if the child gets up for physiological reasons or if he is hungry. But often a child wakes up at night with hysterics, and parents do not know how to calm him down so as not to frighten him or harm him.

What not to do

How to deal with nighttime tantrums

The physiology of sleep is quite complex. Sleep consists of fast and slow phases, replacing each other throughout the night. And if in an adult the slow phase predominates, when the body is relaxed and the brain rests, then in children, especially younger ones, the REM sleep phase predominates.

During this period, the brain is engaged in processing information received during the day. You can observe how the baby's eyes move under closed eyelids, he twitches his arms and legs, pronounces sounds, words, even whole sentences.

In babies, REM sleep occurs throughout the night. The older the child gets, the longer the slow, deep sleep becomes. During the REM sleep phase, dreams occur, which most often cause tantrums in many children. These can be bad dreams, nightmares, or simply an abundance of impressions. This is comparable to the waking moment when a child cries from overwork and many emotions. The same thing happens when he sleeps, only he experiences all this in a dream, not yet being able to distinguish a dream from reality.

What exactly causes hysterics in a child at night is something parents should figure out.

Young children are very sensitive to negative energy. If there is a tense atmosphere in the house (quarrels, scandals or a constantly tired, irritated mother), all this will certainly affect the child’s psyche. During the day, when adults loudly sort things out, insulting each other, a child is able to hide in a secluded corner and quietly watch what is happening, and at night he will experience this horror again. Feeling the weak protection of mom and dad, the baby has nightmares and wakes up in tears.

Important! You need to learn to sort things out outside the room where there are children. It would be ideal if adults learned to conduct dialogues without raising their voices. You can’t drag a baby into a conflict! Mothers who take it out on their children should remember that the smallest irritation is a big tragedy for their son or daughter.

Nightmares are usually associated with increased emotional stress. If during the day the baby was seriously scolded by his mother, he quarreled with a friend on the playground, watched TV for a long time before going to bed, where they showed the terrible Baba Yaga or the “ugly and evil uncle” from an adult film, then at night these fears will return to the child, and hysterics can be avoided It's unlikely to succeed.

You should limit your TV viewing, especially before bed. When a tantrum occurs, the little one needs to be calmed down by stroking his head and whispering warm words to him. If necessary, turn on soft light (a night lamp or sconce with a very weak glow - ideal for a nursery). A good practice is to put your child to bed with his favorite soft toy, which will definitely “protect” him from bad dreams.

Some modern parents popularize education “without boundaries”: you can make noise and run around wherever your beloved child wants, and eat and relax when you want. But there is nothing good in the fact that a child wakes up at lunchtime and goes to bed for the night well after midnight. The nervous system is exhausted, problems with sleep appear.

The daily routine needs to be normalized. The bedtime routine should be pleasant and last at least an hour: play interesting but calm games, take a warm bath, perhaps with soothing herbs recommended by the pediatrician, read books or listen to music.

There are more and more such guys, because modern life dictates its own rules. Parents trying to make a child a genius, unfortunately, often overdo it. From Monday to Sunday, the child attends many clubs, sections, and events. But they do not always maintain such a rhythm.

It happens that a hyperactive child himself requires such a busy life, but you need to think about whether he has time to play with peers or do his favorite things on his own. Bright everyday life carries a heavy burden that the baby does not feel. But at night all this manifests itself in the form of whims arising from overwork.

Note: It is imperative to develop the child, but this should not be done in spite of health. Parents should leave time “for childhood” so that their son or daughter grows up not only smart and comprehensively developed, but also healthy.

Of course, health problems can also be the cause of a child’s nightly tantrums. In small children, these are often teething problems, colic, and neurological problems. Then it is better to resolve this issue with a doctor. It is worth seeking advice if the situation has not improved by the age of 7-8 years (at this time, as a rule, children's tantrums at night stop).

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Parents whose children often wake up at night need to remember that the baby is already scared, most likely from a bad dream, so there is no need to frighten him even more. You cannot shout at the child, trying to wake him up completely, or harshly pour water on him or splash him in the face with water, especially cold water. You can’t slap on the cheeks, much less hit, no matter how tired the parent is.

Some mothers share their experience when a sharp blow in the face helps them with uncontrollable crying at night. But what works for some is not always effective for others. If such a practice has not been used, it is better not to use it. When they blow into the face of a crying child, this causes a temporary holding of breath (which is what the method is based on), but the child’s inability to breathe can frighten him even more, and then the hysteria will develop into panic. The consequences can be the most unexpected: from mild fright to serious neurological problems, such as stuttering.

First of all, you should find out and eliminate the reasons why your child wakes up at night:

Organize a daily routine by setting a time for naps for children under 5-6 years old.
Going to bed at night should be calm, excluding too active and noisy games.
For some time, while the hysterics are repeated, it is better for the mother to sleep in the baby’s room so that, when he wakes up from a nightmare, he is not even more frightened by not seeing his parents nearby. Psychologists, as an alternative, offer a soft toy with which the child will fall asleep.
It is better to show hyperactive children to a pediatrician and pediatric neurologist. Perhaps they will recommend medications designed specifically for children to relieve excessive agitation.

The best thing a mother can do is to take the child in her arms and try to calm him down with stroking, light rhythmic tapping on the back, whispering that she is nearby, nothing bad will happen.

If the child is actively fighting back, there is no way to calm him down; you should not wait for the hysteria to end on its own, because this may not happen. In some cases, especially impressionable children develop fever, seizures, and even epileptic attacks. A soft cloth soaked in cool (but not cold) water will help revive the child. It should be used to wipe the child’s forehead, cheeks, chest, stomach, legs and arms. Due to the temperature contrast, the child will most likely come to his senses, stop screaming and fighting, and then he can be picked up.

If the baby can speak, then in the morning you need to ask him about the reason for the hysteria. For example, mom and dad will be able to explain a bad dream by telling the baby that everything he saw is not reality. And no one will dare to offend a son or daughter.

Very little time will pass, and the nightly hysterics that tormented our beloved child will pass. According to statistics, by the age of four or five, they disappear completely. If the problem is permanent, and in the daytime the child also behaves very aggressively, then you should be wary. Such behavior signals a neurological disease, for example, increased intracranial pressure, which parents cannot recognize on their own.

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Source: prosto-mariya.ru

Should I see a doctor?

In most situations, the help of parents is enough to overcome nightmares, but in some cases it is necessary to turn to specialists. Parents should be alert to the following symptoms:

the duration of the attack is more than 30 minutes;
nightmares come closer to morning;
during an attack, speech is impaired, behavior becomes inappropriate;
a child can cause harm to himself by his actions during a hysteria;
fears do not go away even during the day;
the cause of nightmares is the family situation - conflicts, parental divorce, domestic violence;
over time, the attacks become more severe and last more than a year;
nightmares and hysterics affect the baby’s behavior during the day;
During nightmares and hysterics, the baby experiences attacks of urinary incontinence.

If a child has a nightmare, parents should help him calm down. Alternatively, you can lie down with him, read a book, the main thing is that the baby feels protected

Particular attention should be paid to the course of nocturnal attacks if children have convulsive readiness, expressed in:

sudden movements of the head;
shoulder twitching;
and eye rolling;
protruding tongue;
stuttering;
attacks of enuresis, repeated several times a night;
suffocation;
false croup;
bronchial asthma.

All of these symptoms only aggravate the situation with children's hysterics and nightmares. Reasons to immediately consult a doctor are attacks accompanied by:

screams;
motor excitement;
loss of consciousness.

When such symptoms appear, the baby’s condition is diagnosed and, based on its results, drug treatment is prescribed. To overcome problems, you may also need the help of a psychologist.

Prevention and treatment

In the process of treating a child’s fears, you may have to seek the help of a psychologist.

Nightmares themselves are rarely treated using medications; they usually try to eliminate the cause of their occurrence. In cases where the source of their occurrence is a physical or mental illness, it is treated. If the nightmares are the result of stress or anxiety in the baby, consultation with a child psychologist or psychiatrist is necessary. Sometimes medications may be prescribed to reduce rapid eye movement or prevent night awakenings - this is only done if the child has serious sleep problems.

A psychologist should investigate the circumstances surrounding the emergence of children's fears. While communicating with the baby, he determines the source of nightmares, the degree of their danger and measures to combat them. The main diagnostic techniques are drawings, role-playing games and staging skits - in them, using the example of heroes, you can learn and analyze the causes of fears, and discuss their consequences.

The behavior of children best shows what kind of atmosphere is in the family and how the parents behave. It is they who, by their example, shape the child’s behavior patterns, which can lead to excessive fearfulness or distrust of others.

A calm, even atmosphere in the family, the absence of tension and conflicts will help the child overcome the fear of the dark and get rid of nightmares. Active sports can also be a good help in the fight against nightmares. Swimming, jumping from a tower or over a bar, martial arts - all this will give you confidence in your own abilities and relieve you of the fear of the dark, water, heights, and so on.

Working with childhood nightmares involves eliminating the immediate cause of fear. You should explain to your child that being afraid is absolutely normal and natural, since fear allows you to avoid dangerous situations. Parents should tell him more often that there is nothing shameful in fears, you need to accept them and learn to live with them.

A child's drawings can reflect all his fears and problems. An experienced psychologist will help you understand the causes of poor sleep problems.

How to raise a brave child?

In order for a child to grow up courageous and active, it is necessary to make certain efforts, and the following recommendations can help in achieving this:

do not humiliate, but also do not make the child and his desires the main thing;
treat him as an equal, respect his personality;
do not scare the baby or punish him without serious reasons;
make sure that he has enough communication with different people - relatives, peers, friends;
make various crafts with your child, engage in creativity with him - this way you can monitor his mental state and neutralize fears that appear in time;
Hug and kiss your baby more often - physical contact with your parents will help him feel your care and protection;
monitor the atmosphere in the family - trust, respect and love will help reduce, or even completely get rid of fears.

Features of four-year-old children

The inner world of a 4-year-old person is already quite formed. He knows the world around him well and begins to understand the processes occurring in the environment. At the age of four, a child first realizes that life is finite. Information about death is a significant shock to the psyche. The child does not want to come to terms with the idea that he will one day be gone. Because of thoughts of death, he cries quietly into his pillow at night.

It is impossible to protect a child from information about death. One way or another he will have to experience this knowledge. You can tell your son or daughter that life is not limited to the material world. It doesn't matter whether you yourself believe in life after death. Such information will help relieve anxiety, and as the child grows up, he will figure out what’s what.

How should parents behave?

You can overcome childhood fears by adhering to the following principles:

Respect the child and his fears, do not laugh at them or deny them. Higher participation and attention to the problem will give a greater effect than statements from the series “You are already too old to be afraid of the dark!”, “Stop inventing yourself!” and the like.
Do not shame or reproach your child for his experiences - this will only increase anxiety and lead to feelings of guilt. Let him know that even “real men” have the right to be afraid.
Don't try to force your child to overcome fear directly, for example by leaving him alone in a dark room. Offer him your help and support: look together at all the “scary” places where he sees various dangers, look in closets, under the bed, in dark corners. Not finding anyone there, the child will quickly believe in the groundlessness of his experiences and calm down.
When a child behaves badly, do not frighten him with various monsters and villains and do not threaten to give him away to anyone.

Understanding, care and love of parents are important components for a stable psyche of a child

Children's imagination is the source of night anxiety

All children are not alike - each of them has their own fantasies and their own opinions about everything. They can create the object of nightmares for themselves, and a more developed imagination will only make them more realistic. These child abilities can also be used to overcome fears.

Establish contact with your child to find out the source of the fear. Help your child separate his feelings from himself and overcome them by learning to change and control his feelings. Try for this:

together with your child, compose a story with a good ending, which tells about a way to overcome fear;
make a drawing that depicts fear, and then tear it up - simultaneously destroying the picture and helping the baby take control of his emotions.

Sleeping room

Try to provide your child with a personal room, if your capabilities allow you to do so. The environment in the nursery should create a cozy and calming atmosphere:

Provide good sound insulation in the nursery so that nothing disturbs the baby's sleep.
Maintain an optimal microclimate in the room - Dr. Komarovsky recommends for children a temperature of 18 - 20 ° C and a humidity of about 50 - 70%.
Regularly ventilate the room and do wet cleaning.
Use bedding only from natural fabrics. It should always be fresh and clean, calm colors in light colors. You can also use bedding with your baby's favorite characters.